Porn Jesus

A term used to define a well hung dark-haired male with a beard and long hair.

Damn, have you seen that porn Jesus over there? He's hot!!

by Ruby-Slippers July 25, 2016

vape jesus

Ex-smoker turned on by blowing big clouds of vapor. The "Vape Jesus" is distinct in style. Commonly seen or referred to as a "hippy". Long hair, big beard, loves skinny jeans and cardigans.

"Mom, that creepy man riding the fixed gear bike blowing clouds is looking at me funny."

"Don't worry son. That's no serial killer or pedophile. It's just Vape Jesus."

by mysterysola November 23, 2016

the bearded jesus

When your trabagging your girl and accidentally shart

I was tea bagging my girl the other night and accidentally sharted on her face. She look like the bearded jesus

by Tweeter23 October 5, 2018

Jesus Shit

When you take a shit that is wet enough that it easily slides out your ass but hard enough that it leaves no residue, so the person doesn't have to wipe their ass.

"Jesus shits are hard to get" said James.

by me1342 July 11, 2006

Jesus Jim Caviezel on a Cross

Used in replacement, and carries the same meaning as the commonly spoken phrase "Jesus Christ on a Cross". This is in reference to the guy who played Jesus in "The Passion of the Christ".

"Jesus Jim Caviezel on a Cross, this carrot cake has semen in it!"

by Jolly Judd January 29, 2009

straight for Jesus

A very Christian man that has chosen to ignore his natural instincts and try to make a life with a female because of his belief that homosexuality is wrong.

Scott is straight for Jesus. He clearly is gay and checks me out all the time.

by Christopher J. Smith September 1, 2007

slim jesus

eminem's retarded little brother; skittles.

how to be slim jesus
>be white
>watch Straight out of Compton
>capture mexican kid
>make drill rap

by lolitsalex December 27, 2015