corporate mentality

Large-scale practice of committee mentality within a corporate entity, (see corporate personhood).

To my phone company: You reassigned this phone number to me 6 months after you took it away from the deadbeat who didn't pay his phone bill. Why can't you understand that it's no longer his phone number? Just because you can't find him, is no cause to harass me!

Another person to his phone company: Of course I received your message that the replacement for my broken phone is ready to pick up - just as soon as I got the replacement phone and checked for messages.

Me to the Yellow Pages publisher: Of course I wanted to be listed in the yellow pages under my business name. You offered me a listing in the Yellow Pages because I'm listed as a business in the white pages didn't you? Do you see anyone else listed in the Yellow Pages by their personal name?

by Downstrike November 11, 2004

Corporate Communism

I coined this term in 2001 in personal writings. It was stolen by a popular msnbc commentator who asserted to have coined the phrase and he did not.

It is the Corporate Communism that leads our nation, not the people.

by Hank Photo November 30, 2015

Corporate Whoremonger

See politician.

girl: Ugh! How come every time the economy sucks, the stupid-ass corporations get bailed out? It's not fair!!

boy: Those corporate whoremongers over there at Washington must serve their masters and fuck the people.

by MissCaliBrownie April 9, 2010

Corporationalist

Noun- A person who believes in Corporationalism, the belief that Corporation(s) should have power over the individual, people and governments (locally, regionally, nationally and internationally). Its main characteristic are that it is fiercely opposed to "red tape", which can be anything from union membership to extra safety costs, the big corporations see government as a potential hindrance to their activities. Its main goal is that of all Corporations, to make a profit for its shareholders.

(1) U.S. Congressman House Minority Whip, Eric Cantor from Richmond, Virginia's opposition to Healthcare reform while, being financially supported by this industry and not benefiting his District or it's voters or people is a Corporationalist ideal.

(2) Eric Cantor is a corporationalist because he opposed bailing out GM and Chrysler from bankruptcy because they mainly have blue collar workers, unions and give benefits that sustain the middle class, while at the same time he favors Big Bank Bailouts and Executives keeping their bonuses at the expense of thousands of people who lost their life savings, retirement, homes.

by sweede low August 30, 2010

Corporate turrets

When someone sticks their foot in their mouth in a corporate setting/meeting.

Manager A says "The xyz sales contest is not worth the paper it is written on." Not realizing the current CEO sitting in the room got promoted on that idea. "I can't believe I said that, I have corporate turrets."

by JS63 December 9, 2010

corporate masturbation

the act of discussing business without actually saying ANYTHING, but embuing said corporate masturbator with an undeserved feeling of being of interest or utility to those present or his or her current employer

corporate masturbation can easilly be identified when any of the phrases below (but not limited to this list) are used in the context of discussing a business or business activities:

'going forward'
'restructure our asset-base'
'efficient through-flow model '
'KPI monitoring'
'increase the number of revenue streams'
'consolodating our holdings'
'business paradigm shift'
'stakeholders'
'daynamasism'
'strategic re-evaluation'

etc etc

by bored by business bullshit February 26, 2013

corporate crop dusting

Farting while walking but in a large group. It helps if you go to lunch with coworkers at a Mexican place and each person eats an epic portion of beans. When you get back to the office after lunch, walk with the same group and corporately crop dust entire departments / multiple office cubicles. Can also be applied in elevators, other small enclosed rooms, moving escalators, and more.

Hello, yes, is this HR? I would like to file a complaint. The IT department came by after lunch and performed a corporate crop dusting in our area. It's like the bomb at Hiroshima or something!

by newcents June 9, 2014