when monkeys attack

Shows like Jerry Springer, Maury Povich, Montel Williams & Steve Wilko feature the dregs of the black community doing what comes naturally to primates.
Guests on these shows have sex with any warm body that falls on them, have interracial babies, cheat on their spouses and air their dirty laundry on TV.
When one of these sub humans gets offended they get their inner monkey on and attack!
They physically attack their spouse,their baby daddy, the girl/boy friend of their spouse or even the host.

I watched Steve Wilko today, they had a when monkeys attack episode.

by jsd9632 February 21, 2012

inverted spider monkey

A high level sex move in which the girl is face down on a bed (imperative given the power of the thrust) the man positions himself on the girls buttocks facing her legs, which are held by the man as far up as he or she can handle. The man then penetrates straight down for maximum depth- after that its a matter of thrusting as hard as possible until one or both of the partners bursts into uncontrollable screams. And that is the inverted spider monkey.

Mike did you hear that the interns where doing the inverted spider monkey last night, apparently the screams could be heard for blocks.

by TheOnlyTruth1 July 6, 2010

African Tree Monkey

When you tape a girl to a tree and you do her doggystyle and you stick a popsicle in her ass.

I african tree monkeyed my girlefriend in the jungle

by Adam Rumley May 4, 2006

pet my monkey

What horndogs like myself do to pass the time when no one is around.

I am so fuckin' thick down below...I just love to pet my monkey all the time.
See also spanking the monkey

by lawnmowerman October 29, 2004

flog your monkey

For a guy to masturbate.

Tim: "i am so horny right now!"
Sarah: "Jesus Christ Tim, just go flog your monkey!"

by snowangel July 2, 2005

Flaming Ass Monkeys

Used in refrence to the annoying pieces of human waste that you get lodged or stuck to you after eating spicy food and then having an attack of the backdoor trots which then these pieces of waste burn and annoy you to no end.

Ex...Male 1: Oh fuck dude I have the worst flaming ass monkeys from that taco place ever.
Male 2: I know that sucks so bad.

by Kayleb August 20, 2005

rigger monkey rape

1. An oxymoron, as any self-respecting rigger monkey welcomes violent penetration.
2. Imitating an orangutan while engaging in an unwelcome and unexpected donkey punch.

Hey sweetie, what's your #? Can I take you out some time for dinner and a movie and afterwards a quick rigger monkey rape?

by Hannibal March 29, 2003