Gordian Twat

1) the female object of your enduring and persistent efforts who has never found it in her heart to part her knees for you. 2) a tease 3) the one that got away. 4) the one that never goes away, but will not put out for you today or any day.

Guy 1: I just made plans to grab drinks with Jessica from marketing. Guy 2: Don't bother, I've been trying to unravel that Gordian Twat for over a year. I keep telling myself she's a lesbian so that I don't have to kick her out of the spank bank.

by dryellowfever November 22, 2011

twat spider

1. Clump of female pubic hair found at the drain after a shower or bath. 2. Pubes accidentally ingested while performing cunnilingus.

I wish my wife would wax her bush because every time she takes a shower the drain gets covered with twat spiders.

I was eating out Jill the other night when suddenly I started gagging on a twat spider.

by k9bubba August 26, 2009

twat badger

a mixture of cocoa powder, maca and sherbert, put into a line and then snorted. it is thought absorbing the super foods through the nasal passage is the best way to consume them. twat badger is often found at small uk festivals.

dave: i am feeling well rough today
carl: best have a line of twat badger to brighten yourself up

by bubblehahahahahahahaha July 29, 2014

twat waffle

a vagina that is so shriveled up that it looks like a defrosted waffle.

Jo went down on Mary and thought he was eating breakfast.

by Lamifer September 13, 2004

The Twitter Twat

Term used by David Cameron to describe people engaging in frequent instantaneous communication on Twitter

Too many twits might make The Twitter Twat

by Paul Pontin July 31, 2009

Twat Band

When you get the four (or six) plastic can rings (normally with an alcoholic beverage, i.e. Beer) and you and your friends put a hand in each ring and pull until one person is left with the plastic around their wrist. Thus making them a twat.

"Oh, lets play Twat Band!"
*Everyone puts their hand in and pulls*
(to the person left with the plastic on their wrist) "Twat!"

by CrazyRetard March 19, 2010

twat-spat

An argument or debate between two females. The subject of the argument will be relatively minor and the two shall remain friendly during and after the twat-spat.

That was a wicked Scrabble game! Kelly and Julie were having twat-spats over every word the other spelled!

by keltikfyre October 28, 2010