The state, usually long-term, of being a closet homosexual that is beyond the usual level of gay and is too much of a pussy to come out of the closet. This person is usually very angry at the world because he/she has not yet advanced to being able to be a sexual accurate being.
Larry asked his girlfriend for anal sex on such a consistent basis it became clear to her he was a closet clinger.
"Oh for Christ's sake, I wish Jim would just stop closet clinging and stop using my sister as a ploy to come across as heterosexual" (friend repilies) "Fuck yeah, he's always such a moody bitch every time our family gets together I wish he would just stop closet clinging too!"
"Get outta my ass you dirty closet clinger"
"Oh for Christ's sake, I wish Jim would just stop closet clinging and stop using my sister as a ploy to come across as heterosexual" (friend repilies) "Fuck yeah, he's always such a moody bitch every time our family gets together I wish he would just stop closet clinging too!"
"Get outta my ass you dirty closet clinger"
by Squeaked Moose October 21, 2011
Anyone who has political views and or opinions, but are too afraid to say what they think to remain neutral and avoid confrontation.
CNN Reporter: "What are your views on the Wall?"
Closet Politician: *Oh no, what should I say?* * If I tell CNN what I truly think, they will twist my words and I'll somehow end up on Top 10 worst criminals in the world.*
CNN Reporter: "Sir?"
Closet Politician: "Give me one second, I'm still thinking."
CNN Reporter: "It shouldn't be that difficult, it's not like I'm asking you to do a backflip?"
Closet Politician: "Did you just ask me to do a backflip?"
CNN Reporter: *Before reporter can get a word out*
Closet Politician: *Does backflip*
CNN Reporter: *Sighs and walks off, talking aloud to himself* " How are we going to make fake news if everyone is too afraid to tell us their political views, that is the fifteenth backflip someone has done today."
Closet Politician: *Oh no, what should I say?* * If I tell CNN what I truly think, they will twist my words and I'll somehow end up on Top 10 worst criminals in the world.*
CNN Reporter: "Sir?"
Closet Politician: "Give me one second, I'm still thinking."
CNN Reporter: "It shouldn't be that difficult, it's not like I'm asking you to do a backflip?"
Closet Politician: "Did you just ask me to do a backflip?"
CNN Reporter: *Before reporter can get a word out*
Closet Politician: *Does backflip*
CNN Reporter: *Sighs and walks off, talking aloud to himself* " How are we going to make fake news if everyone is too afraid to tell us their political views, that is the fifteenth backflip someone has done today."
by Mr.TrollNDaNTaNet January 31, 2019
by Yanks01 January 06, 2009
Refers to an individual (usually a male) who is in a relationship with another individual (usually a female). This person is a huge simp but will do whatever it takes to hide that side of themself from everyone. Acts tough with a hardshell but deep down simps for their significant other.
"Jeff is such a hardo, buddy a straight cold hearted savage. Doesn't get pushed around ever by his girl"
*When alone with his girl, Jeff is a huge pushover closet simp*
*When alone with his girl, Jeff is a huge pushover closet simp*
by YungJazzers July 08, 2020
a person of homosexual tendancies, but does not tell anyone for a long time. They spend a long time "in the closet" thus making them a closet monster.
guy 1: "man did you hear? Lance Bass finally admitted he was gay"
guy 2: "yeah it's about time, that fag was such a closet monster."
guy 2: "yeah it's about time, that fag was such a closet monster."
by Ryan July 27, 2006
The act of gathering up some friends of yours to hide in a closet in ninja costumes and then while in the same room fuck your girlfriend/boyfriend that you found cheating on you. Make sure its a painfull experience for the other person of course and while in the sex make a key word for the friends to come out of the closet and beat the shit out of the girl or boy. Then have them run off.
by Ray Velrasquez October 08, 2007
by drac6000 December 12, 2008