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Quantum

A term used when referring to water, usually served in a glass jar. It is most commonly heard in the Northwest, specifically in the greater Eugene, Oregon area.
Hey Katrina, pass me that quantum. Yeah, that reallllly hits the spot.
by Rivy D September 14, 2007
mugGet the Quantummug.

Quantum Science

NOT a fucking roblox group. Its the study of area of study about information science related to quantum effects in physics.
Dave: "hey is that the quantum science public discord"
John: "no this is a fucking book on the study of quantum science you sodding tic tac."
by Excerain November 23, 2020
mugGet the Quantum Sciencemug.

quantum rizzics

Quantum rizzics is the act of a discrete quantity of energy proportional in magnitude to the frequency of the radiation it represents by picking up so many women you puncture the fabric of space-time,

It is also a play on words for Quantum physics which is a difficult science, such as this science is difficult to master.
Mathew has a degree in quantum rizzics.
by professor of quantum rizzics February 14, 2023
mugGet the quantum rizzicsmug.

quantum theory

A novel and revolutionary way of viewing the world, the main postulates of the quantum theory include...
1. Light exhibits dual wave-particle behaviour as does all matter. The photoelectric effect and the discovery of light having momentum led to this belief and the theory that energy is absorbed and emitted in finite 'chunks' called quanta. The wavelength of macroscopic material, however, has such a small wavelength that we still treat them with the laws of Newtonian mechanics rather than wave mechanics. Since electrons have a tiny mass, however, their wavelength becomes somewhat significant.
2. Werner Heisenberg and Erwin Schrödinger went one step further on this. Heisenberg said if we know the position of the electron outside the nucleus we have no idea what its momemtum is and vice versa. Schrödinger then took this into account and proposed a new model of the atom. This is often illustrated as an electron cloud, where the denser the cloud, the greater the probability is of finding an electron.
3. A natural consequence of this is that there is an inherent imprecision in nature. The physical world is just based on probabilty.

(That's my attempt at explaining it. I'm not shocked by the theory so don't assume I know what I'm talking about.)
"Anyone who is not shocked by quantum theory has not fully understood it" - Niels Bohr
by jeffrey_smith June 14, 2005
mugGet the quantum theorymug.

Quantum Jerk

Quite a bit like schrodingers box, when a man (or woman) is in the bedroom with the door closed they are in a hypothetical state of both jerking it and not jerking it at the same time.
"Whare the hell is your roommate? " "oh he is pulling the old quantum jerk." "What?" "Well technically in this space and time, he is both beating off and not at the same time due to lack of knowledge but as we can clearly see while I open the door, he is shredding his meat like a mad man on bath salts"
by MX29 December 8, 2019
mugGet the Quantum Jerkmug.

Quantum Sex

A spiritually uplifting sexual act celebrating Cosmic Unity, generally believed to be in higher-dimensional resonance with the Big Bang (a.k.a. the Primordial Sploog). Thanks to this Divine Resonance, an act of quantum sex (according to some very odd folks) may serve as a re-enactment of the original Divine Union or, as some might say “the God in me slapping bellies with the Goddess in you” – which, coincidentally, is thought by some analysts to be the linguistic origins of the breathy rhythmic phrase “Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!”

Some philosophers believe that since the Milky Way Galaxy is, in fact, composed of the Whoopie Sauce created in the Big Bang, and since all human beings are inhabitants thereof, it follows that human beings are, indeed, micro-manifestations of the Grand Whoopie itself, thereby lending scientific credence to the claim that quantum sex can provide important insights into the qualitative nature of the cosmological Big Bang. Other philosophers (and a majority of scientists) respond by carefully suggesting that the aforementioned philosophers "should shut their fruckin' pieholes.”
The phrase “quantum sex” appears to have originated in a ponderously unfathomable internet article called, oddly enough, “Quantum Sex” written by the ever-popular philosopher/sexual freedom advocate, Gaylen Moore, who is widely known for his claim that physics experiments are best performed under the influence of fully engorged naughty parts.
by Sir Woof-a-lot January 15, 2011
mugGet the Quantum Sexmug.

Quantum Cryptography

A common euphemism for gay anal sex between a student and a professor, especially when the student is the submissive (receiving) partner and the professor is the dominant (penetrating) partner. This phrase is thought to have originated at Caltech, though it has also become common at Stanford and MIT.
Gautam: Has anyone seen Andrea lately?
Navid: I think he's in his advisor's office... probably studying quantum cryptography <knowing look>
Jialin: Wow! They've been in there three hours!
by CallsItWhatItIs July 5, 2017
mugGet the Quantum Cryptographymug.

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