The southern most front facing orifice of a woman. The vagina. The tuna canoe. The haddock hidey hatch. The pink. The front bum.
She let me touch her mackerel kayak last night, that sh1t tight!
by Jaybibz October 9, 2022
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The last dance of the evening where a lady has removed her knickers beforehand to provide easy access in the event of scoring
Candice "There was a very savoury aroma in the club last night"

Susan "Oh, yes, I was doing the Mackerel Tango with Steve but he was having none of it"
by laurab193 May 8, 2011
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The Spanish Mackerel is a self defence move where the victim ducks down, grips the attacker’s balls as if he were milking a cow. While gripping tightly at the top of the ball bag, the victim starts to twist the ball bag. Once a slow but firm twist is established the attacker will hold their breath, at this point a fast additional turn will make the attacker scream like a spanish mackerel. This is a quick movement, in total may take up to 2 seconds although needs to be precise. Practice on a stocking with a boiled egg in it is recommended. True Spanish Mackerel Masters referee to as “Spankels” have been studying the art since birth although the basics can be learnt after a days practice.
Person 1: Give me all of your money!
Person 2: Touch me and I’ll give you a Spanish Mackerel.
Person 1: Please Sir, I’m extremely sorry. Can you please find forgiveness as my balls cannot handle another Macky.
by FishyCombat69 January 17, 2019
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A vagina that has the firmness of a condom full of grapes
Wow man! That's a sloppy mackerel
by Flappy pancake February 10, 2015
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