A Jon is a person with great levels of responsibility. Jons are
name dropped daily when people want to sound important or knowledgeable. If you know a Jon, consider yourself
blessed.
Jons are bosses of all the bosses. They don’t f*ck around. Jons are probably best known for their informative, lengthy emails. Jon emails remind people how to do their jobs.
The best part of a Jon email is the ending because Jons often try to make these funny. Jon worshippers will read the final paragraph of a Jon email and smile or laugh before they set out doing ‘Jons work’ for the
day.
Strengths: Jons make everyone feel listened to and important. Jons like to bring people together for the greater
good. Jons fight for the vulnerable or disadvantaged. Jons are not afraid to row with people when necessary. Jons can wing a PowerPoint zoom like an absolute pro.
Weaknesses: Jons have a terrible sense of humour. They like dad
jokes and toilet humour and will persist with a bad joke even if nobody laughs.
Warnings: Jons have a penchant for brutally bringing people down when the need arises. Don’t piss a Jon off, you may well live to
regret it. Jons can be savage, unforgiving and
moody.
“Oh my daiz! Did you see today’s Jon email?! He is so funny! His emails are the light of my life and I simply cannot function without them. I particularly love it when he posts
dud links on purpose! His comedy
genius knows no bounds!”
“Yea I saw it but I just skipped to the JonJoke at the end like I always do. Did he have anything important to say? I’d
better go back and read it again or he might get moody”