disasterbation

When your wank turns into a disaster for whatever reason.

Someone walks in on you.
You ran out of tissues.
Your laptop freezes half-way through video.
etc.

Guy 1- (wanking)
Guy 2- (walks in) " Ewww! "
Guy 1- (goes red)
Guy 2- (walks out)

DISASTERBATION

by FATALATOR1 November 22, 2011

disasterbation

The uncontrollable and critical urge to stimulate one's own genitals for sexual pleasure, often after an extended period of celibacy (e.g. long road trips spent in shared quarters with family members)

Alan: Hey, man, wanna go grab a few drinks at the pub tonight?

Brian: Sorry, I just got back from taking care of my grandmother for three weeks, and she has no Internet at her place... It's time for some SERIOUS disasterbation!

Alan: No problem, dude. See ya next week!

by SansFapFlap May 9, 2011

Disasturbate

To fantasize over SHTF scenarios.

Watching that show Doomsday Preppers is great way to disasturbate.

by Evan Estaog May 26, 2012

Disasterbated

The act of masterbating after an unsuccessful night of trying to bring someone home from the bars.

Matt: Did you bring someone home last night?
Jake: No, there wasn't anyone drunk enough to come back with me.
Matt: That sucks dude
Jake: It's okay because I disasterbated when I got home.

by Baldginger December 12, 2012

Disasterbation

A calamitous event, one occurring suddenly and causing great misfortune; a failed attempt at masturbation.

If somebody walks in on you or a tornado comes while you're a masturbating and you're interrupted... your attempt to masturbate becomes a disaster - disasterbate - disasterbation

Dude: My mom caught me jacking off man...

Sweet: Damnn.. Tragic man, disasterbation can hurt a guy for real

by ^RoxyRoll^ March 10, 2018

disasterbation

When a colossal disaster strikes, and you use it as an excuse to flex on social media.

It's so sad how the Cathedral of Notre Dame is burning down; here's a photo of me in Paris last month

Stop with the disasterbation.

by GreaterBaiter April 16, 2019

Disasterbation

When you’re using a vibrator that wasn’t fully charged so you keep stopping to briefly charge it so you can finish but you never charge it long enough to give it enough juice to get the job done.

After her vibe died three times, Kay decided to put and end to the disasterbation and threw the useless thing across the room.

by Bill’s Meat April 16, 2021