monkey toe bullshit

verb: the act of using one's toes to pinch people; one can be a monkey toe bullshitter, but is not common to say.

"goddamnit aaron, i will cut off your feet if you don't quit with that monkey toe bullshit"

by alexxx April 23, 2006

panic monkey braking

when on/in a moving vehicle and there is a very sudden unexpected need to stop quickly, panic monkey braking occurs. this is the kind of braking where there is a cold sweat generated that drips (usually down your buttcrack) that you don't feel until after you are past the incident (assuming you didn't hit whatever it was that you were braking to avoid).

i was riding my triumph street triple in lincoln park at night yesterday when a stealthy 200 pound dog bolted out into the street in front of me between two cars! panic monkey braking ensued, and i was able to avoid hitting him, but i *will* need a new set of underwear.

by dhr46 June 12, 2011

Monkey Finger Pie

When a guy with long monkey fingers creampies a girl and then fingers her after.

David monkey finger pie'd me last night and I came so hard.

by ihavehair100 March 8, 2014

Monkey Duck Boy

Males with extreme genetic ear and lip traits.

That guys a real Monkey Duck Boy

by jad1965 November 7, 2009

Holy Barrel of Monkeys

an expression used when completely at a loss of words to say, or when there is a lull in any conversation.

"Jacob" is on a date with "Jane"...
jacob: *points at girl at the bar.* oh my god, look at her. she looks pathetic.

Jane: um, that's my friend!
***awkward silence***
Jacob: Holy Barrel of Monkeys!

by Almost Urgent July 14, 2009

uncircumcised monkey penis

A fabulous piece of machinery that is all natural and organic. It gets the name money because it has hair like a monkey's for comfort pleasure.

My friend has a nice uncircumcised monkey penis, it gave me and his girlfriend good pleasure at work yesterday.

by Mr.grittypants69 April 29, 2022

Shit Covered Monkey

When a person is going through a bad personal time, such as a divorce, they become a shit covered monkey. None of their friends want to hang out with them because they're afraid that some of the shit will land on them as well.

Sorry bro, but you're just a shit covered monkey right now and nobody wants to be around you. They're all afraid you will shake some of that shit off and it will land on them. Hang in there bro, once all the shit is shaken off they will talk to you again.

by Frenchie Free May 30, 2018