Similar to SARM Goblins, bench goblins are most often a large group of teenage boys ages 14-18. They travel in hoards and invade gyms at peak hours. You will most often see them taking up the bench presses or any benches by the dumbbells so they can hit chest for the 4th time in a row during a week. Often times they take up multiple benches during all times of the day to hit a very mediocre set of 135.
“Dude you wanna bench press and set a new PR?”
“Nah we cant, there’s a group of bench goblins taking up the benches, they will be there for at least an hour.”
“Nah we cant, there’s a group of bench goblins taking up the benches, they will be there for at least an hour.”
by Swos July 14, 2022
You call someone this when they are genuinely ugly or just as a joke, you can say this to your boss, best friend, that one teacher, boyfriend, ex, a Walmart employee, your uncle in jail, my uncle in jail, and your parents. If you wanna go crazy call that person a silly goofy goblin.
mad-e: I'm talking to this guy rn and I think he's ghosting me....i still love him tho
lin-z: he's a Goofy Goblin for that
lin-z: he's a Goofy Goblin for that
by Hater_I-hardly-know-her-1789 September 14, 2022
A dude that cares way too much about Discord badges, and tries to get them in every way possible, like selling or buying them.
by tvrhd2022 May 17, 2023
Shoblin Goblins are mythical creatures that prey on the cereal supply in people's houses. It is well known that their favorite meal is corn flakes. Although typically nocturnal, Shoblin Goblins have been known to occasionally camp outside Walmart Supercenters waiting for people to exit with corn flakes in their shopping carts. Their primary form of attack is breaking into homes and rolling up to the foot of a person's bed, before screaming "Gimmie all your corn flakes bitch" and flailing around. If a person makes eye contact with a Shoblin Goblin at night, they enter a form of sleep paralysis and proceed to shit and piss themselves at the same time. To make the situation worse, they have to powerlessly watch as the Shoblin Goblin tears apart their pantries in search of corn flakes. Shoblin Goblins are short in stature, and relatively passive unless corn flakes are involved. Their voices are said to sound like Golem from lord of the rings but more congested. In the event that you are faced with a Shoblin Goblin, it is important to remember to call your resident Shleeble warrior to come kill it.
Did you hear what happened to Demetrius the other day?! He got jumped by a Shoblin Goblin and might not ever eat a box of cornflakes again!
by Cheeble November 22, 2020
A squash racket - the most fearsome weapon known to man. It is wielded by only the most fearless, and can only be activated while screaming.
by chestergie October 13, 2020
Alcohol induced event when a man thinks he picked up a hot girl in a dark club with makeup and a nice dress on, has sex that night, then the next morning wakes up to find she is a goblin looking creature.
James tells Glen, "Hey man did you see that hot Asian bartender Clint picked up last night?" Glen, "Yeah she was cute!" James, "Well Clint woke up in the morning and had a Goblin Surprise, she looked like Yoda from Starwars!"
by TuckDCconnect January 05, 2011
by Only a Beta September 07, 2021