a dirty johan is an explicit sexual act which occurs when a man and a woman are engaged in intercourse, two German midgets (one named Johan) enter and defocate on the females chest and facial areas. Shortly after, the men smear the fecal matter into specific patterns, replicating a German adapatation of the Karma Sutra. After the traditional smearing and design, the German midget circle the female while chanting the German word for shit, or "shizer". To finalize the ceremonial tradition, the woman subsequently engages in intercourse with both the original male and both German midgets. It is mandated in German tradition that consumation of the tradition only occurs when the woman has all three parties participating in simultaneous penetration.
During my trip through Eastern Europe, I was absolutely delighted by my experience at one particular brothel. At this place of business, was when I first experienced the dirty johan. At first, I was slightly apprehensive. However, I must say the German men were terrific and to be honest, I've never seen anything quite as breath taking as a woman, covered in feces, begging for rougher anal, vaginal and oral penetration. Needless to say, I was quite pleased. Oh and by the way, this brothel was in a small corner of South Eastern Berlin. I can provide the name of the place if necessary. Happy hunting my fellow noble men!
by dubz13 July 7, 2010
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Get the Dirty Monson mug.this is accomplished by making a surprise-dry run at a females anus.
This cannot be a simple push in, you must be at least two steps behind the female and, she must be taken by surprise AND cry afterwards.
This cannot be a simple push in, you must be at least two steps behind the female and, she must be taken by surprise AND cry afterwards.
Tom: Dude what happened to your eye?
Jerry: Mary hit me.
Tom: Why did she hit you?
Jerry: I jumped my dick in her ass dry. After she stopped crying from the Dirty Tebow I gave her she slapped the shit out of me.
Tom: Wow, you deserved it ya asshat.
Jerry: Mary hit me.
Tom: Why did she hit you?
Jerry: I jumped my dick in her ass dry. After she stopped crying from the Dirty Tebow I gave her she slapped the shit out of me.
Tom: Wow, you deserved it ya asshat.
by The psuedonym's pseudonym February 24, 2011
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Get the Dirty German mug.a girl who has a big bush, quirky because she dyes her hair everyday, but still knows how to have a good time, she thinks her lighter tattoo is quirky but realistically will never come in hand. is covered in piercings. lowkey the hottest chick around.
by bigw1lly101 May 2, 2020
Get the dirty maisie mug.The art of throwing up on the guy's unit, then proceeding to give him head, then polishing it off with dirty, raunchy, animal sex.
by Juanto Kueelson September 19, 2008
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