John Laurens

John Laurens was this dude in the 1700's who is a totally a turtle boi and has all my love.

John Laurens is spicy

by Turtle_boi1754 September 19, 2020

John Holden

The funniest person ever.

person 7045: this music is so bad i wish I could find a better artist
person 7046: I know a better artist
person 7045: who?
person 7046: John Holden.
person 7045: Who. The. hell. is. John. Holden.
Person 7046: John Holden Deez Nuts, LolZ.
person 7045:ok
person 7046: wait wha

by EpiKGaMer694201337AmOguS October 13, 2021

John

An informal name for a toilet

Please excuse me while I use the john. . . .

by The Nightmare Hour July 7, 2017

John

An EL Italian boy who is secretly an animorph.

John? Are you an animorph?

by animorphlova May 4, 2022

John

Another name for a noun. Most commonly used jokingly. (Person, place or thing)

“Man look at that John” “yeah that John huge!”

by Fartkocker124 December 7, 2023

Johned

To be completely and utterly obliterated, typically by way of an incredibly forceful skull fucking.

Holy shit man, Eric just got fucking Johned into pink mist!

Person #1: Did you see that Johnning last night?
Person #2: Yeah dude, I haven't seen somebody get Johned like that since Brad got his eyeball ripped out and the empty socket fucked with a 12-incher.

by SleepySap May 8, 2017

John

A man who pays for sex is a "John"

That John in the red civic didn't pay me last time, go surprise that MF.

by Nugtron August 30, 2021