Asians taking a lie detector test Part 2

Son: "In order to lie.... I had to fail the test."
Dad: *pulls off shoe and throws it at son*
Son: "Ow! Dad, don't you want this? This way no one will kn-"

Dad: *pulls out glock 19 and starts firing at son*
Son: *barely dodges bullets* "Dad, stop!"
Dad: "You fail test! You stoobid! You not my son!" *pulls out AK-102*
Son: *gets hit in leg* "Ow! Dad, you have to stop!"
Dad: *ignores son* *dismembers son with five shells from a Challenger 2*
Son: *groans in agony*
Dad: *tases what's left of son's body *
Son: *attempts to scream in agony, but instead blood comes out of his mouth*
Dad: "You not my son! Son no fail test!" *lifts off in a A-10 Warthog armed with the Gauzer machine gun*
Son: "Please dad.....please..."
Dad: *crashes plane into son, ejecting himself 30 inches from the ground*
Son: .
Dad: *raids a U.S. Army bunker and steals 10 nukes*
Dad: *nukes house with son in it, then nukes the whole country just for good measure*
Dad: *evades paparazzi and kills families to live in their houses for 4 decades*
Dad: *becomes president, nukes the world then uses mods to terraform Mars*
Dad: *rapes your mom 10 times to repopulate the human race*
Dad: *eventually dies at age 142, wearing a suit with a red rose in his lapel and sunglasses*

No wonder we never saw that kid again.... Holy shit!

And that's why you've never heard of: Asians taking a lie detector test Part 2

by PORGSSSS November 28, 2023

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Newton's Fourth Law (pt.2)

Newton's Fourth Law (pt.2) applies directly to tech companies. It states that if one half Indian and two full blooded Indians that live in a shed in a third world country living off curry chicken, from chickens living in their shack, along with a $300 laptop and a dial up internet connection have enough fire in their stomachs (not from the curry chicken) can beat you to market with your own tech idea -- you might as well not start at all.

Yvette:
I have this idea these boys pitched me that would revolutionize my business. There was zero risk on my part, it was a complete slam dunk. But although there was no risk, I couldn't lead my team with enough passion to be able to defeat Newton's Fourth Law (pt.2).

Wing Wang Wong: My chink friends and 2.5 Indians had this idea. We only had a $150 laptop and water vapor as an internet connection, but the combination of chinkiness ratio of eyes and brown skin on our team, pure grit and will to win allowed us to defeat Newton's Fourth Law (pt.2) (we're all multi-billionaires now).

by Jeetus Christ November 29, 2023

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