Wankers' hatrick

A status achieved by an individual who owns all three of; Range Rover Sport, Mont Blanc pen and Rolex watch. A brash display of classless materialism.

That guy has a wankers' hatrick

by Tony Vegas August 24, 2017

Disney wanker

Someone who thinks Disney is better than anything else and wants everyon else to like it as much as them to

That guy i was talking to is obsessed with Disney he can’t talk about everything other than Disney what a complete Disney wanker

by Sex vibe July 18, 2018

Gon-Wanker

A person who thinks they are of sporting excellence and believe they are the manager but are in fact a wanna-be, annoying little prick

He was a right gon-wanker t football yesterday.

by DarkLord7 December 5, 2014

Briefcase Wanker

When you really wanna get to someone they fucking piss you the shitty balls off.

You fucking briefcase wanker! I'll get you, you little slag!

by PlayMakeReview July 17, 2021

Investment wanker

An investment banker who wears a white shirt with a gilet (normally Patagonia) and chats a lot of shit

That guy over there is 100% an investment wanker. Just look at his vest.

by Dave and Dan in Singapore February 17, 2023

water wanker

A water wanker is one of those annoying people who uses very frequent breaks for water (and making everyone else wait) as an excuse to avoid/have time to recover because they can't hack a pace of a game/sport/workout.

Can we just play this game please?

No we can't because John is having yet another drink break - what a water wanker!

by Tormentedjedi November 24, 2014

Combover wanker

A combover wanker is a new wave of asshole, they usually have a combover and talk about "swag" alot. They refer to "lad culture" regularly, yet they don't realise that getting clap at a house party and using yolo as an excuse to be a dick isn't "lad culture". They are commonly found in the age gap 14-25. They can be identified by their hair, snapbacks, ironic band shirts and share a mentality similar to the common hipster. They like to attack people who aren't "combover wankers" and often put these "attacks" on vine to get likes. They also try to latch on to other peoples things, for example, many combover hipsters wear baggy jeans and call theirselves "indie", despite the fact that they only ever heard a stone roses song once in their car with their dad one time when they were ten. These people are also similar to the cretins seen on shows like towie or made in Chelsea.

(Jon turns up wearing a nirvana shirt)
Peter: hey I like your shirt, are you a nirvana fan?
Jon: oh yeah I love teen spirit
Peter: I'm a kurt cobain fan myself
Jon: who the fucks kurt cobain I found this shirt at a house party,yolo!
Jon is a Combover wanker

by Polish Paul June 13, 2013