logic grenade

A statement of fact, usually in the form of an e-mail, that renders all hostile (emailers) silent

Employee #1: I had been getting calls and e-mails all morning about the Widget Project. Managers want status, test group wants results.
Employee #2: What changed? Why did they stop?
Employee #1: I silenced them all when I explained to them the Widget Project was, in fact, not my project (according to my manager) and they need to direct their efforts towards <Employee X>
Employee #2: Sounds like you lobbed them a logic grenade

by Jenkem Hog March 25, 2008

Customer Logic

Throwing all reasoning out the window and being the stupidest fucking moron you can humanly be.

It operates under three basic principles:

1. Complete lack of accountability (even actively refusing to take any)
2. Complete lack of empathy (i.e. sociopathic behavior)
3. Unwarranted self importance (i.e. severe narcissism)

Formal logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: if you park on No Parkin areas, you get a parking ticket.

Customer logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: OMG IT WAS JUST A FUCKING MINUTE I WILL GO TO THE NEAREST STARBUCKS TO DEMAND TO SPEAK TO THEIR MANAGER AND ASK FOR FREE LATTES FOR LIFE BECAUSE THEY SHOULD'VE TOTALLY WARNED ME ABOUT IT AND WILL SUE EVERYONE BECAUSE MY PARKING TICKET IS EVERYBODY ELSE'S FAULT.

by MrDanteSesma December 16, 2019

pouya logic

An absurd logical device that can bridge the gap between any two logically inconsistent ideas. Widely regarded as the most significant development in formal logic since Aristotle’s term logic.

It’s on the way. Pouya logic.

by magniloquus June 25, 2022

Cartoon Logic

AKA Cartoon Physics.

A law in cartoons that states that if something impossible would be amusing if it actually happened, then it will happen.

That's not the entire rule, either; see below.

The full definition of Cartoon Logic is as follows:

*Should the character be able to do this?

> Yes No

*Would it be funny if they couldn't?

> Yes No

*They can't do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

Yes > No

*Would it be funny if they could?

> Yes No

*They can do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

> Yes No

*Would it be funny if they couldn't?

Yes > No

*They can do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

Yes > No

*Would it be funny if they could?

Yes > No
*They can't do it.

by Ubeenbamboozledson June 5, 2021

Georg Logic

When you are just dumb your logic is called Georg Logic

Someone: "There are to many, to many speaking in voice chat of choice!" Twenty minutes later: "It is to quiet in this voice chat!"
Someone else: "boi this Georg Logic!"

by BlackLightDragon August 22, 2020

papa logic

Papa logic is the idea that we are all dads. I’m a dad, you’re a dad, we’re all dads. He, she, and they are dads, and we’re all papas.

Person 1: “Dude, Mason’s such a dad “
Person 2: “Ya man, and JD really understands that papa logic”

by papa triesty June 1, 2018

Angora logic

A form of logic which is synonymous with fuzzy logic. Predominantly used in business.

The IT team uses angora logic to confuse the business.

by Michelle Thomas July 7, 2008