Joint Guard

The person in the group that is designated to hold the weed whilst the group is moving areas. Usually a dumber person, such as certain jocks or the distant friends.

Brian is so weird, the only reason we keep him around is to be the Joint Guard .

by Evan_Dayhoff March 17, 2018

The National Guard

Yeah didn't anyone say anything about Donald Trump sending in the national guard before it happened? Like, the reporting on the protest and the guard happened at the same time.

Hym "I can think about whatever the fuck I want and you are going to get someone's kid murdered if someone doesn't stop you. The National Guard need to start hunting down the freaks doing this to me starting with the new MeidasTouch freaks put them in a gas chamber. And then work their way backwards down the list."

by Hym Iam June 13, 2025

splatter guard

A device made from toilet paper that keeps diarrhea from splattering all over the toilet.

Girl, you ate those BK onion rings last night. You're gonna need a splatter guard.

by jman2001 May 20, 2014

Guard

To protect someone and or something

There are many people assigned to guard the crown jewels.

by Thecheechmeister March 1, 2023

Dark Honor Guard

A group of guards that protect everyone while at the same time killing said everyone whenever a hostile is spotted.

Their bloodlust for Tking is eternal.

Sith Person: "Hey is that a Dark Honor Guard?"
Other Sith Person: "Yeah...make sure to be nice to them, they are the special ed ones."

by DinotheCrusader January 30, 2021

JFK the grimmy guard

Noun: A hospital guard who used to pronounce (usually grave) dying patients of either being rushed to ER or confined.
Noun: A one-sided, ruled by fascist superiors, kind of motherfucking individuals.

1. "That JFK the grimmy guard killed my granny!"
2. "Damn! How the hell he's alive, maybe JFK the grimmy guard forgot to look upon him."
3. "Valderrama? That clown, motherfuckin' looking face, is the real JFK the grimmy guard."

by Bozo D. Clown August 31, 2017

sneeze guard

A piece of glass to protect the buffet food

Waitress: Our kitchen is slammed, it's much quicker to get the buffet.

Patron: No thanks, I don't trust the sneeze guard.

Live from grande prairie Alberta, sept 2017

by Toxicale April 19, 2018