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Absolute Unit

The absolute definition of a chonker.
An absolute unit = a gigachad of immaculate form.
Goncalos are natural born absolute units.
Goncalo: I'm an ABSOLUTE UNIT
The rest of the lads: yeah whatever...
by Le Handle May 10, 2021
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Absolute Luck

An extreme or large amount of luck.
Daniel: "John, I have absolute luck!"

John: "Really? What do you mean?"

Daniel: "I just landed over twenty bottles flips!"

John: "Dude, bottle flipping died off like years ago..."
by Brainless Maniac October 13, 2024
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Absolute Boy

The term “absolute boy” is often used as a slang expression to describe someone who is admired for their savagery or celebrated for their aggressive actions, dirtbag personality, or general degenerate vibe. It typically conveys a sense of endearment and respect.

The definition can vary depending on context, but generally, an “absolute boy” is:
• A legend or hero: Someone who stands out for their drinking skills, distasteful humour and love for their boys.
• Unapologetically themselves: Someone genuine and confident in their dirtbag identity.
• Unreliable and fun: A person who brings energy, joy, or discouragement to those around them.
Nicole: “Did that guy over there chug that beer in one gulp?”

Jon: “Yeah , he always chugs his first Guinness of the day. Fucking Legend. He’s my Absolute Boy”
by Dirtbag6969 December 15, 2024
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absolutes

The comparison of two items with properties. The first being that one average item trumps the other average item but if both items are "good" then the reverese is true and item 2 becomes better.
grass absolutes turf.

meaning your average turf is better than your average grass pitch but a good grass pitch is better than a good turf.
or
brunettes absolutes blondes.
meaning your average blonde is better looking than an average brunette but a 10/10 brunette is more attractive than the 10/10 blonde
by Oh My Goodness :O December 31, 2024
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absolutely jorkin my shit

A higher form of jorkin it usually in a communication form meaning to jack off in an aggressive manner
Yo I’m absolutely jorkin my shit right now and by it let’s just say my pentis
by The-jorkin-king January 13, 2025
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absolute koon

Tyrone: YAH BRO, JUST HIT THE JAX OFF A GIRLS THIGH!
Zach: You're an absolute koon!
by zacthemac October 31, 2019
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Absolute faggotry

When someone is being so gay they become straight then gay again
Anyone who uses a shotgun I call of duty shows absolute faggotry
by Everduse July 18, 2025
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