napsterbating

masterbating while taking a nap.... mostly for girls and their dildo's

hey suzie what did you do all afternoon....Well i was napsterbating for a while then i woke up

by jackamoe June 14, 2010

masterbating date-imitater

The guy who imagines a whole date with a girl using his hand as the girl. He'll cook diner and then just makeout with his hand too scared to make a move, c,mon you know they exist....

.....also, he may put clothes on it, even name it

Doug: "Hey Rocco, remember Norb?"

Rocco: "Ya, man, he used to try and get me to talk to Julie, ...I mean his hand, ...really freaked me out man.

Doug: "Dude I know, he was a classic case of a masterbating date-imitater."

by deliverer of babys January 16, 2011

Crying while masterbating

The depressive state where your hunger for vagina overshadows your temporary sadness. This state often results in the victim masterbating over violent porn, using his own tears as lubricant as desperate howls of anguish escape his lips.

B.A. was crying while masterbating after someone paid out his altezza tail lights the other night.

by Anal ejaculator January 12, 2012

fasterbating

Fasterbating is when fat slobs who usually eat and self-gratify simultaneously go on a diet and just gratify themselves on an empty stomach.
-
Self-Gratyifying oneself to eating disorder porn

Person 1 : Wow, is that that same fat freaky slob that never leaves the house, they're kinda looking, less fat and slobby, though really still freaky
Person 2: Yeah, they've lost a lot of weight since they started Fasterbating
Person 1: Fasterbating?

Person 2: I know, I'm never eating again

-
Person 1: *walks in* -looks at screen #puuuuke#
Person 2: I was fasterbating, what?
Person 1: Nothing, *gasp* nothing at all

by Comrade Plasternasty October 8, 2010

NASTURBATING

SHAGGIN THE UGLIEST PERSON IN THE BAR JUST FOR THE HELL OF IT!

'DID YOU SCORE LAST NIGHT'? " IT WAS GETTING LATE OPTIONS WHERE LIMITED , I DECIDED TO DO A BIT OF NASTURBATING. SO I LIFTED TINA AND WE LEFT FOR HERS"

by FRAGMASTER2 April 23, 2021

asterbating

Jacking off to a ass you saw earlier in the day

Imgonna have to go home and be asterbating

by Bigotisyouknowthis January 6, 2016

Masterbating window licker

A person that follows you , annoys you, and always seems to be standing behind you . He or she tries to do eveyones job but their own with an intelligence level of a fucktard

Did you just see that masterbating window licker

by Whoswho 1 June 4, 2018