Hypochondriamialga

A person who complains about eveything wrong with them, when NOTHING is wrong with them at all!

My body aches everywhere. I can feel my hair grow. I can feel my toe nails grow. I'm always in so much pain. My Hypochondriamialga is acting up.

by Ally Mcdeal December 19, 2008

Digital hypochondria

A special type of hypochondria in which one has the constant and irrational fear that their computer is infected with a virus, despite multiple Anti-Virus programs repeatedly finding that nothing is wrong.

Those who suffer from this anxiety disorder are said to be digital hypochondriacs.

Jim: Look, if something was going on, Norton would have said.
Dwight: Shut up, Jim, I know something's wrong...
Jim: Look, your computer doesn't have a virus!
Dwight: Shut up!
Jim: You're have digital hypochondria. You need to see someone about it.
Dwight (ignoring): Come on, McAfee...finish the scan....

by A Person Named March 14, 2014

hypocondric

Someone who is constantly worried about getting various diseases, and tends to find symptoms for these all the time

Eric was a hypocondric when he thought he had cancer.

by SayTheWord May 14, 2009

Vehicular Hypochondria

A severe mental disability in which sufferers chronically experience acute anxiety attacks related to the welfare of their vehicles. A typical vehicular hypochondriac may face bouts of depression and paranoia stemming from the false belief that his/her car is malfunctioning when it is in fact operating in perfect order.

Sane Human Being: Why are you giving away all of your earthly possessions and digging a large hole in the ground in front of a tombstone with your name on it?

Vehicular Hypochondriac: Well, my check engine light came on today. I'm going to die.

by MikeMikeMikeJimJim April 9, 2010

hypochondria

1. a declaration made by medical professionals and blowhards when faced with an illness they can't decode with a quick once over or basic blood test. This conclusion is often reached once insurance benefits are maxed out, or even more rapidly if the person is uninsured or has an HMO. By assuring the patient that he or she does not actually suffer from the symptoms they visibly see and feel, these doctors can dispense the coveted diagnosis of crazy before moving on to the next obviously crazy not-sick patient. This hypochondria declaration also helps distracted doctors maintain something sort of like integrity, because it's not like they didn't know or didn't try, and it's not that insurance companies suck or that it's sometimes hard to pinpoint a cause and treat it -- really, it's just the dirty, dirty patient's fault for being so darn kooky. Very similar to miserable women being perpetually diagnosed with hysteria back in the day, except no one prescribes vibrators for treatment anymore.

2. the default response of narcissists who consider those suffering illness inconvenient.

1. Well, antibiotics didn't work, so we've been thinking it must be all in your head. I'm writing you a prescription for hypochondria. Pfizer has been working on a great formula for you. You might have heard of it, since the name is written on this pen I'm using. Now, I've got a tee time to make...

2. Even since I was diagnosed with hypochondria, the rash melting the skin from the left side of my body has totally cleared. I'm really grateful to my doctor for noticing it was a massive hallucination.

by aboom March 6, 2013

moral hypochondria

Symptomatic of global guilt and a victim mentality on social issues usually voiced via social media or rallies.

The keyboard warriors are suffering a severe bout of moral hypochondria

by Powzy March 13, 2020

Hypocardriac

Someone who always things something is wrong with their car.

A parent who has to inspect your car every time you come back from being with your friends.

"Do you hear that noise? I think I have a belt loose." "Dude, thet's the engine. Quit being a hypocardriac."

"My dad is such a hypocardriac. He went over every inch of my car with a magnifying glass looking for scratches."

by VladmiraI February 15, 2009