rationalization hamster

The rationalization hamster is a legendary creature dwelling deep in the minds of the self-delusional, and is particularly common among young liberal women. From birth, the rationalization hamster enters a symbiotic relation with its host, whereby whenever the host feels a craving to do something completely insane and malicious that will have horrible consequences for everyone in the long run, the rationalization hamster will jump on its wheel and run really, really fast, getting the magical hamster wheel to spin out a long sheet of paper full of neat rationalizations for the ultimately devastating action.

Rationalization hamsters are thought to be a key component in producing liberal scholarly works, particularly those of feminism. Young, liberated women often rely on it to explain their attraction to the asshole who is going to pump and dump them, as well as their contempt for the nice guy who, unaware of the hamster within, strives fruitlessly to gain their true love. Older, liberated women also rely on it for dumping their husbands and using the resulting child support money on jewellery, cars and/or crack.

The adulterer: Well, it's okay to lie about cheating on him and say it's his baby, as long as his feelings aren't hurt!

Some dude: Whoa, you think it's okay to lie, cheat and commit paternity fraud on your man? Your rationalization hamster must be working overtime!

The adulterer: But it's not my fault I slept around, it kinda just happened! And those guys probably raped me because I don't really like them right now anymore...

Some dude: Hot dang, that's one tough hamster!

by rampaging teddybear of wub December 14, 2012

hasta la vista, baby

A spanish term used in the movie Terminator 2. In English, it means, 'See you later'.

Hasta la vista, baby.
Hasta la vista, sir.
Hasta la goddamn Windows Vista!!!

by fedrik June 28, 2008

Spicy Hamster

/v/ verb:To eat a burger or similar and drip hot sauce onto your gloves without realising and then finger a girl with the gloves still on, creating the effect of a peppered rodent.

Can have a similar effect to figging

Rob: 'I was at the Bonfire Night BBQ last night and had a burger with chilli sauce, then things got steamy with Bethany and I gave her a spicy hamster without knowing. She was squealing with pleasure!'

Callum: 'Good thing she's into that kinda kinky shit like tentacles and S&M

by Vanilla Chinchilla November 21, 2010

second choice hamster

Someone that you would hook up with when you can't get with your first choice. The name is a reference to when you were a little kid and you went to the pet store and you wanted something cute, like a puppy or a bunny or a kitty, but your mom said NO, so you got a stupid little hamster instead.

He's totally my second choice hamster, so I only went to see him for a few minutes after I got with the guy I really like.

by Tweeples June 5, 2013

Haste the day

Indeed "Haste the Day" is a great band, but the other meaning has a deeper meaning. It stems from a biblical reference in which "Haste the day" means; Seize the day, take full advantage of the day that you're on, don't let a chance slip by that you may never get back.

Theres so much to be done, I must Haste the day, and get everything accomplished.

by adam "peteey" June 1, 2006

hamster thot

hamster thot is another name for hoe. Usually with buck teeth, and named khloe.

"omg khloe your such a hamster thot look at your teeh!"

by dickmaster2014 June 3, 2014

Post-Haste

Immediately. ASAP, or as fast as you can.

1)I have to finish this report Post-Haste!
2)I'm famished, someone give me food Post-Haste!

by Will Radford December 15, 2005