Anal Glaucoma

An excellent excuse to try to not go to work.

Lazy fucking idiot: Sorry Boss, I can't come into work, I'm not feeling well.
Boss: What's the matter?
Lazy fucking idiot: I have Anal Glaucoma.
Boss: What the fuck is Anal Glaucoma?
Lazy fucking idiot: I just can't see my ass coming into work today.

by PhoenixGamer34 May 31, 2023

gluteal glaucoma

A bullshit excuse for not coming in to work. or to cancel plans. "Gluteal" literally means ass, and although "glaucoma" is technically an eye disease, another definition of the word can also be: "a poor excuse". So this phrase basically translates to "my ass ain't coming to work and I don't have a good excuse".

John: "hey boss, I'm not coming to work today".

Boss: "wtf John? Why not?"

John: "I have Gluteal Glaucoma".

by dillonstrider413 March 11, 2024

Glaucuma

Glaucuma is a condition that is a result of the contact of a male's ejaculatory liquid into the eye of the recipient. Symptoms include a film of man juice in the recipients eye, redness and loss of vision. Not to mention relentless bitching from the receiver.

After taking a few too many shots of tequila, Kristy wanted to take a shot to the eye, now that bitch has glaucuma.

by Theechillsauce January 10, 2009

anal glacoma

The act of not seeing your butt doing anything for a current event.

Boss: "Why did you not come to work?"

You: "Well my anal glacoma was acting up."

Boss: "I have never heard of that medical condition. Sounds serious."

You: "Yeah it is. I couldn't see my ass coming to work. "

by OutlawJN December 15, 2008