Fasturbate

The quick and painless act of masturbating in a time period of less than 5 minutes. Usually applies to young middle school students with a small penis and a weak sense of longevity. Can be good for breaks between classes and/or in class.

"Jebus, I really hope that the teacher doesn't catch me beatin' the meat, because I am terribly ashamed of my small penis. What if she laughs at me! Well, I guess i better fasturbate to make it quick!"

Judy: "Oh Steven come down on me!"
Steven: "Well, we have 10 feet till we get to the pick-up window to get our food. Can you fasturbate with me?"
Judy:"Oh yes! That would be lovely!"

by Sarga April 2, 2008

flagsturbate

The act of timulating or manipulating one's own genitals while thinking patriotic thoughts, especially with a flag.

Ben: Alicia did you hear about Flagsturbation?
Alicia: LMAO WTF

Jemima: I used to flagsturbate but then I lost faith in my country. It's the saddest thing.

by vincentstreet March 5, 2009

fartsturbating

The act of pleasuring oneself sexually meanwhile farting either accidentally or intentionally.

Tim: You look tired.

Todd: I couldn't sleep. My little brother was fartsturbating in our bunk bed last night.

by thatgirlvan July 14, 2011

fapsturbate

Fapsturbating is when someone (girl or guy) masturbates to a guy fapping.

Isabelle likes to fapsturbate to her boyfriend when he faps on a skype call.

by put a dick all up inside her March 2, 2015

Frazturbate

This is an unusual variant of the common 'shank (shower wank). It involves a very specific routine of begining the ritual of self-endulgance with hot shower water until fully erect. However, there is a subtle twist compared with the conventional 'shank'. At the point of full erection, the hot water tap is turned off, leading to ice cold temperatures. It is left at this temperature until the erection has fully deflated and the testicles retreated internally. After this the hot water is turned back on and the act of masturbation is continued until final climax. It is believed the logic behind 'fratuzbation' is to increase the sexual pleasure of the final orgasm.

John frazturbated in the shower.

John and his friends frazturbated together.

John frazturbated for heightened sexual pleasure.

by The Witness93 October 7, 2012

Fansturbate

When you take a dump that smells so bad the exhaust fan turns itself on.

Dude - I just took a dump that sparked a fansturbate!

by CaryAD April 23, 2008

Frusturbate

Masturbating out of frusuration.

I haven't got laid in so long, it's time to go frusturbate!

by IROC/ SPILBY November 17, 2012