Barnstaple

A small (shitty) town in North Devon. Reputed to be the end of the universe, this was disproved when it aquired a 'Subway' and was deemed to be slightly better than Bideford, its nearest rival for that particular accolade.

Barnstaple boasts a number of shops, 'attractions' and pubs. Most of the population spend at least 65% of their time in the latter, choosing to stab, glass, or at least stamp on- any outsider.

Any outsider to Barnstaple can be identified by a grasp of the English language, a recognised qualification (any) or an inability to be fascinated by a 'Subway'.

Let us not visit Barnstaple, there are Subways in other places, yet these places do not revere this fact as they often have more interesting things than a heated sandwich.

by Mr Dan January 29, 2007

The Barns and Noble

Process to obtain revenge on someone who has damaged your life in a major way. First visit barns and noble's magazine section remove as many of the loose subscription cards as you can carry. Fill in the targets name address ect..rubber stamp is best. Check the boxes for 2 year subscription and bill me. Drop them in the post office drive up drop box. Do this for 100 cards once a week until you feel better. For extra credit look for depends adult diaper ads they have free samples coupons send as many of these as possible. Good luck

That bitch filled a false police report , so i gave her. The Barns and Noble.

by MaXPuFZ August 20, 2016

Barnsley

A town found in South Yorkshire that is constantly slandered for it's culture. It has bad points...(Morons and an incompetant council) but is much like every other town and city found in England.

P.s The people of Barnsley never, or rarely speak like this; Am guin t'pit. They don't mine either.

by Orator of verum August 19, 2008

Bairstow

A face like a slapped arsehole. Generally reserved for ginger haired cricket playing individuals.

Numt: Hey Bumt, did you see the Bairstow on that ranga at the crease!?

Bumt: Yes Numt. Yes I did.

by Bumty August 25, 2019

A Barnsley

An unexpected semi.

An unexpected semi errection, like Barnsley's run in the 2008 FA cp reaching the semi final's

Dude, last period I had a Barnsley.

by Chesk September 23, 2009

grain bains

Short, fat string beans which have been boiled for far too long. Served ubiquitously in the south.

Dude: "Somebody boiled the shit out of these green beans!"

Scary obese lady chef: "Don't you like grain bains?"

by TreeWeezel November 19, 2010

got a Barnsley

An expression that means 'unexpected semi erection'. To have a Barnsley. Derived from when Barnsley FC unexpectedly beat Chelsea to go through to the Semi finals. Used for when one is aroused by something one would not have previously expected to be aroused by. Also used to describe an erection that has just come from nowhere.

James: Watching Susan Boyle has given me a Barnsley..

Greg: Get up Joel, we gotta get to class..
Joel: Give it a minute, I got a Barnsley

by WordWeasal May 25, 2011