ass from a hole in the ground

Someone who is clueless

He doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground.

by Muncy Reader May 5, 2016

stairway in a grandfather clock

A total upset. One of the biggest surprises you've seen in a long time. Like discovering Ma'am and George had a secret passage to upstairs for Webster, hidden away inside a faux grandfather clock.

"Wait a second. So you're telling me Ivy is a dude???"

"I slid off her pants and...fuck. I think I'm going to be sick again."

"She didn't have a bulge or anything?"

"Nope. Like a fucking stairway in a grandfather clock...ugh...I'm going to hurl again."

by pH Balance January 31, 2008

Shines like a diamond in a goat's ass

To say: "Shines like a diamond in a goat's ass" is to provide high praise for something or someone. A harsh term, it is often used by men in the working trades. A star baseball player on a mediocre team could be said to "shine like a diamond in a goat's ass." Often, the phrase is used as a compliment for a really nice car or motorcycle. Ironically, it would not be appropriate to compliment a diamond ring or other jewelry with this phrase. (Body piercings excepted.)

1. That new chrome on your Harley-Davidson shines like a diamond in a goat's ass!
2. The ghost flames on your pickup truck make it shine like a diamond in a goat's ass.
3. Inappropriate usage: "Your engagement ring shines like a diamond in a goat's ass!" (That might get you bitch-slapped.)

by rook's Buddy May 23, 2010

swinging a cat in a gymnasium

Metephor for having sex with a female that is very "loose". The extra vaginal space can be compared to swinging a cat by it's tail in a large room, such as a gymnasium.

Jim: "Yo, I heard you've been banging Samantha. She good in bed?"
Joe: "Dude, that chick's been around. Banging her is like swinging a cat in a gymnasium."

by thewakeupguy April 23, 2008

Mile in a glass jug

To titty fuck a girl between her breasts, or glass jugs, if you will.

I really needed some Mile in a glass jug, so I approached Veronica, the town slut, propositioning that she let me titty fuck her massive jugs.

by BenJuan May 2, 2010

Poop in a group

A synonym of the idiom: To have one's shit together

I'm looking for a real man, a man who's got his poop in a group.

by iski123 February 1, 2009

up in a grip

To have one's balls in a vice-grip. To beshackled by an unpleasant task preventing fun times that were previously planned.

I'm all up in a grip here. My boss just gave me the Lumberg. Gotta come in on Saturday. No Vegas for me.

by evil adam June 10, 2009