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Restroom Soccer

1) The art of using one's feet only when inside a public restroom.

2) To avoid germs in the bathroom, a strict no hands policy of flushing the toilet with a karate kick or hooking the top of one's shoe under a stall door to open it.

3) The World Cup of Crap.
He was very skilled at his restroom soccer, an accomplished Pelé on his home field of Brazil, but not on a field and not in Brazil. In an Exxon Mobil shitter.
by Wyatt Junker July 11, 2011
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Mundial Retardinho Soccer

The Paralympics equivalent of the World Cup. Except unlike the Paralympics which accepts people with any disability, Retardinho Soccer only accepts those with mental disabilities, and even includes people who are not disabled at all, but simply just retarded.
My application to Mundial Retardinho Soccer was accepted after I asserted that 2+2=5.
by Idontknowanymorepleasehelp August 25, 2020
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soccer mom save

When you stop short while driving and throw your arm out to restrain the passenger from being thrown through the windshield à la soccer mom
Today some asshole cut me off and while I was braking I totally soccer mom saved Nadia.
by Bernay March 4, 2009
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soccer mom

A middle-aged, overprotective woman, usually the mother of two children with names like Britney, Brandon, Caitlyn, Austin, etc. She is usually blonde (often bleached) and has average to above average looks (the latter usually being also a "trophy wife").
She lives in the suburbs, doesn't work (may become an obnoxious realtor after the kids go off to college), and spends an inordinate amount of time at her kids' schools, usually to the chagrin of the teachers and/or administrators.
She is the reason, and the ONLY reason, why Kids Bop has a market because she wouldn't dare let her precious children listen to the actual versions of Top 40 radio.
She drives a gas guzzeling SUV embossed with soccer decals on the rear window. If her husband is particularly successful (usually an overpaid attorney), she drives the higher end version of said SUV (such as the GMC Denali or a Lexus RX 330) so as to show all the more middle income SMs that she is just a bit better than they are.
The soccer mom popped Kids Bop 6 into her cd player to entertain her daughter, Britney, while driving her to gymnastics. After dropping Britney off, she sped to her nail appointment. Her husband, Jeff, later met her at the Country Club after he finished playing a round of golf with his buddies from the firm.
Meanwhile their son, Brandon, who had been busy applying to several colleges, was taking a break by fucking his girlfriend in his parent's hot tub.
by Tom Fool June 11, 2007
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Soccer Puppy

A Soccer Puppy is a member or supporter of the Fort William Football club in Scotland, based out of Fort William in Lochaber, Scotland.

The name derives from their performance in the 2017-2018 season, when they finished with -7 points. A consequence of an SPFL penalty when Fort William FC fielded an ineligible player for 3 games (losing 3 points per game). That ineligible player was in fact a golden retriever, who was given a custom jersey, and added to the roster under the pseudonym, Buddaigh MacDug.

From his tenacious performance, and the subsequent shame of having the worst single season record of any football team - ever - the team was given the moniker "The Soccer Puppies" by the Scottish Football community.
Did you see the rumour that James Forrest has signed on to be a Soccer Puppy next season?

Naw mate, that's a chocolate lab, you dumb cunt.
by Woodlandscaley August 25, 2020
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Soccer Puppies

The Soccer Puppies is a nickname for the Fort William Football club in Scotland, based out of Fort William in Lochaber, Scotland, as well as their ultras.

The name derives from their performance in the 2017-2018 season, when they finished with -7 points. A consequence of an SPFL penalty when Fort William FC fielded an ineligible player for 3 games (losing 3 points per game). That ineligible player was in fact a golden retriever, who was given a custom jersey, and added to the roster under the pseudonym, Buddaigh MacDug.

From his tenacious performance, and the subsequent shame of having the worst single season record of any football team - ever - the team was given the moniker "The Soccer Puppies" by the Scottish Football community.
Steer clear of Lochaber this week, the Soccer Puppies' ultras are gonna stomp any Bhoys that set forth North of Ballachulish.
by Woodlandscaley August 25, 2020
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soccer mom

A horrible phenomenom which begun taking over middle class America in the mid-90's.
Still fixing lunches for 16 year old Bratty Tammy and her soccer-playing suburban brother Aiden? Then you're a soccer mom.Die.
by David M. Kennedy July 25, 2006
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