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Mercury Mistress

"A fine automobile is something to be admired - even adored. It's an extension of you. You love your car so much, you want to share your most intimate moments with it. Well, now you can. Introducing the Mercury Mistress, the world's first car that you can actually have sex with." Clip from SNL.
Me and My Mercury Mistress gonna hit the blvd . .
by Robsatx November 5, 2005
mugGet the Mercury Mistressmug.

Soiled Mistress

A glance of disapproval, reject, disgust, or hatred. Usually given by strangers or rude friends.
Joe: She is pretty why don't you ask her out?
Harry: I thought I had a chance until I smiled and she gave me a soiled mistress.
Joe: Oh man.. that sucks.
by codliveroilman May 13, 2013
mugGet the Soiled Mistressmug.

farmer's mistress

Person 1: I need some wool to make this sweater for my girlfriend, any ideas where I could get some?

Person 2: Try the farmer's mistress.
by MrCorrect1985 September 18, 2009
mugGet the farmer's mistressmug.

legit mistress

noun: a person that is sexually Involved with another person who is still legally married but also separated or pending a divorce from their spouse.
The wife and I are getting divorced and I’m dating this smoking hot millennial, she’s my legit mistress.
by Bearded bandit from outerspace December 17, 2019
mugGet the legit mistressmug.

mistress drink

Energy giving cocktails, such as jaegerbombs, vodka red bull, consumed before a visit to a mistress or girlfriend to enhance 'activities'. The modern man's Spanish Fly.
Wing Kin often had a mistress drink before visiting his girlfriend Susan Hsu. She was much younger than him and it helped him keep up with her needs.
by domino woodstock June 7, 2011
mugGet the mistress drinkmug.

mistress of the night

In the old days, 'mistress of the night' or 'lady of the night' meant that a women was a suductress, harlet, or whore. It also is a statement that applies to certain pop culture madams, such as Elvira. "Unpleasant dreams..."
A vibrant belladonna, she was a mistress of the night, and a lover of good pasta.
by Jennisis May 10, 2016
mugGet the mistress of the nightmug.

fitness mistress

A woman who has frequent sex with a man in order to help him get in shape.
Sam my man, you should get a fitness mistress to help you with those love handles!
by Carl1983 June 24, 2012
mugGet the fitness mistressmug.

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