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say i swear to god 

something you say to somebody when you don't really give a shit about their story. this is a phrase usually used when somebody else won't shut the fuck up about something you don't give a fuck about. you usually let them talk for a little while but when they get to the point of being annoying, that's when you tell them, "Say I swear to God." In short, it's just another way to let somebody else know you don't care. When you tell them to say "I swear to God," they usually get the message right away after saying "I swear to God," and shortly afterwards realizing that it means you don't care.
Melissa: Cancun was so awesome! We were at the bar every night! We met totally hot guys! One night we all danced on the bar after we did like, 20 jelly shots apiece! And then Jill made out with some guy who was like, 35 years old! We were all dying laughing! It was so funny!

Me: No way! Say I swear to God! (in a cocky ass, sarcastic manner)

Melissa: I swear to God! (realizing you don't care)
say i swear to god by TwanDiggity September 3, 2005
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yall i swear 

The caption when you post a picture of something odd or wacky happening but are too unoriginal to come up with a proper title.
Yall i swear. (Picture of monkee eating fruit by the foot)
yall i swear by Macky Mainiacki October 14, 2020

I can life I swear 

When you fall off your bike trying to do a jump. Completely break the bike to the point where the wheel falls off. And you lie to your parents about how it broke.
I can life I swear by Big Yeet.com December 1, 2019

bro I swear this dude 

Something retarded people say when they cannot respond normally or act like a normal human being.
Hey guys, let's go sit outside!
Bro I swear this dude
bro I swear this dude by hhhhhhh7 December 12, 2021

dat gurl gotta dic i swear 

When u think a gurl a boy.
hey dat gurl gotta dic i swear. I know!

Its Lag I swear 

"Its Lag I swear" is a term commonly used by hackers in attempt to trick others into thinking they're lagging.
"I'm not hacking, Its Lag I swear. I have bazillion ping"
Its Lag I swear by Another guy idk September 28, 2022

Didn't do shit, I swear

Definitely did something wrong, and is doing a poor job at covering it up.
Doug - "Hey you didn't have anything to do with that missing child, did you?"

Dave - "I didn't do shit, I swear."