crocked

shitfaced,drunk,done,burnt,and other wise completely fucked up

We just cracked open the Souther Comfort and got crocked.

by shitter friend October 5, 2003

Crockosaur

A type of imaginary dinosaur that feeds on pain and misery. It will devour sadness and anger, and often bad people, until only love and happiness are left. This is why everyone close to or within eating distance of the Crockosaur will be gripped by uncontrollable spasms of laughter, because anything that upset them has been devoured.

NB/ The Crockosaur cannot get rid of bad politicians, famine, AIDs (or other STD's), Cancer, evil villains such as Darth Vader or Count Dracula, armies or lawsuits.

"We were all bickering on D of E, but then Johnny noticed a Crockosaur and we all started laughing."

"My koawala bear died, and I was awfully upset, but a Crockosaur came along and ate it. For some reason this cheered me up."

"I was being sued because I gave my secretary AIDs. The Crockosaur came along and made us all feel a little better. However, the lawsuit remained, and so did the STD."

by The master of bears January 18, 2010

cockortunity

Judging a career opportunity on the premise of there being hot chicks that work there or immediately in the vicinity of the place.

"The job in the valley is a little closer to my house, but the job in the city seems to be a better cockortunity for me."

by entrep June 13, 2009

Crockblock

(n) Refusal of contact with an individual based solely on the fact that they are wearing Crocks (tm).

Check out that guy's shoes! What a total crockblock.

She was really cool until she crockblocked me with those shoes.

by Randy&Penni July 23, 2013

Country Crock

A spit roast with the entire family.

A Country Crock with my brother and sister is fun, but it's way more fun with mom and dad.

by horny_toad69 August 14, 2019

Chris crock

Meaning “ok” or “cool” similar to the term “bet”

“Dude you got that promotion you wanted? Chris crock!”

Or

“You need some crud? Alright. Chris crock.”

by Chris crock 1 June 21, 2018

crock of shit

More politely known as "a pile of poo", the term "a crock of shit" derives from an ancient Roman custom that coincidentally took place in Roman times. It referred literally to a pot into which people would excrete if they were particularly bored by whichever freelance philosoper happened to be talking rubbish at the time. The Roman empire employed crock-monitors who were each assigned to a philosopher, and it was their job to monitor the pot (or crock). Should the crock become full, it would be presented to the philospher, who was obliged, by law, to announce that it bore a remarkable resembence to himself, thus proclaiming he was full of crap and was, in fact, talking a crock of shit.

"I am talking a crock of shit", Socretes 429 BC

by Nigel Hill September 26, 2005