William John Mallabone

Well, what can we say ladies and gentlemen. This man here defies the laws of chads. Only studs can be given this name.

Gosh you're so handsome and fit, what's your name? William John Mallabone.

by CertiChadFinder101 November 24, 2021

Elton Johning

A type of dive you would do at a pool, called Elton Johning because it replicates the feeling of listening to a really good Elton John song. When the water level is about the same height as ledge in a deep area, one will somersault into the water while plugging nose with fingers so water does not rush up their nose. Instead of immediately coming back up to the surface for a breath you would stay in the water for a few seconds as your body is slowly brought back up to the surface until you need to catch a breath.

Past tense: Elton Johned

Person 1: My favorite part of visiting the swimming pool is Elton Johning!
Person 2: Me too! It evokes the same feeling as listening to Goodbye Yellow Brick Road's chorus!

Person 1: Are you ready to leave the pool yet?
Person 2: Not yet! I haven't even Elton Johned yet!

by ultraspecialboy May 11, 2022

john sigma

john sigma is someone who is a mid level sigma. noun

Wow that man is a john sigma

by doge7439286 February 24, 2025

John

Used to describe any generic object or person. Can replace a noun.

"Look at that John"
"I'm gonna make this John"

by Drake_neeta_max_ween January 15, 2025

John Muffler

A dude who be muffling johns, aka suckin dick

"Shut up Sam you just a lil john muffler"

by Nopyyy February 2, 2024

John Thumb

Defined as the act of releasing one’s bowels in a manner where the shape of said excrement perfectly fits into the bottom of said toilet, plugging up the hole well enough to prevent successful flushing. Similar to the tale of the boy holding back a leaking wall with his thumb, this unintentionally shaped turd plug seats itself tight enough to hamper draining of thy marble throne.

Once I was finally able to push out that brown submarine from my ass, the dam turdpedo clogged my toilet so bad that my plumber said he doesn’t respond to JOHN THUMB service calls.

by Apologetic Shiek December 16, 2023

John Kennedy

A dumb joke two little kids made as a mockery of our friend from school looking like a presidential figure's grandson. John Kennedy

Hey dude look it's John Kennedy!

by I<3mitski January 18, 2022