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Grattan wank

Masturbating to the lingerie pages of a clothing catalogue, as you did when you were 13 and couldn't get hold of proper filth.

Also handy for when you want a change of pace from mind-blowing internet-based grot.

(The Grattan catalogue was popular in the Uk about 15 years ago, and had a huge ladies underwear section.)
"Dude, I went old school and had a badass Grattan wank last night"
by Ohfoshizzo November 2, 2009
mugGet the Grattan wankmug.

Scream wank

Having a screamer is where you scream very highly upon climax. Often found to be nicer in echoey tunnels and/or cave systems. Can be referred to as a screamer/scream jerkin'
'I only have scream wanks.' - Ross Hornby
'Are you having a scream wank?' - Alex Smith
by Sewell - A True Hatter February 10, 2015
mugGet the Scream wankmug.

Wank Buddy

A friend (usually male) who you meet up with and masturbate each other. May also include other activities depending on the persons involved.
John is Steven's Wank Buddy.
by ABP1976 January 13, 2009
mugGet the Wank Buddymug.

spaghetti wank

A spaghetti wank is where you masturbate using a thin tube, such as dry spagehtti, and insert into your uretha - piss tube - to provide sexual pleasure.
Bill: I had a spaghetti wank earlier.
Ted: Oh
by Emily Davis November 2, 2006
mugGet the spaghetti wankmug.

Maxi-wank

The act of recklessly masturbating onself into oblivion. One must not confuse any other ways of masturbation with the maxi-wank, as an authentic maxi-wank requires the person practicing to ejaculate on his thigh and stomach. One must also fall asleep immediately following ejaculation without the typical "tissue routine" in order for such an act to be constituted as a maxi-wank.
Tim: Hey where is Paul, isn't he supposed to be making dinner?

Oliver: No I don't think it will happen anytime soon, I walked into his room before and he was asleep with cum all over his stomach and left thigh. It was obvious that he had a maxi-wank.
by luciferlou September 18, 2012
mugGet the Maxi-wankmug.

epic wank

When you've been spanking the monkey for an hour or more, doing your hand mantra and exceptional kamasutra to almost, almost, almost.. ..and then finally release a load so great it's almost comparable to sex - this is what we call an epic wank.
-I just had the most epic wank last night, to some epic xxx.

-The moment of which my tremendous load shot through the canal of my penis and shot out after the two hours of holding it in can only be described as absolute bliss, nothing like taking a piss.

-*shooting out the biggest load*. Wow. What an epic wank.
by utterduck 9k May 11, 2010
mugGet the epic wankmug.

Wank battle

The act of messaging back and forth between two people, sending pictures of five people the other finds attractive while masturbating, until somebody ejaculates, winning the wank battle.
Dude, Kyle and I were wank battling last night for hours, and just when I thought it would be a draw he sent a picture of Jenna Jameson and I finished and won the wank battle.
by D10N_CB3 July 21, 2021
mugGet the Wank battlemug.

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