by Dick Taint August 3, 2009
Get the The Bronx Position mug.by I LOVE UGG BOOTS April 28, 2010
Get the The Noah Position mug.An arbitrary way of 'scoring' your life and determining whether you are enjoying a good time or in a 'trough.'
Nominally, death may correspond to -10 where 0 or below indicates psychological distress. A score below -10 is possible if you are so suicidal you havent got the energy to go through with the act. (DONT DO IT CALL THE SAMARITANS!)
A score of 25 indicates sex, with 35 mindblowingly good sex.
Nominally, death may correspond to -10 where 0 or below indicates psychological distress. A score below -10 is possible if you are so suicidal you havent got the energy to go through with the act. (DONT DO IT CALL THE SAMARITANS!)
A score of 25 indicates sex, with 35 mindblowingly good sex.
by mids99 September 13, 2009
Get the sex death positioning scale mug.Being snuggled up in bed - warm and toasty - on your back like a baked chicken in an oven or in one of those plastic to go containers at the grocery store.
by meinnc2011 January 10, 2011
Get the Baked Chicken Position mug.The two-handed facepalm position made famous by Captain Jean-Luc Picard. For use in cases of intense disappointment, soul-wrenching ethical distress, or upon witnessing profound fail.
by Martin Wandering May 10, 2011
Get the Picard position mug.Noun
1. Similar to a standing "fetal position", it's when you can tell somebody has to take a crap by the manner in which they are standing.
1. Similar to a standing "fetal position", it's when you can tell somebody has to take a crap by the manner in which they are standing.
by billebllunt May 9, 2014
Get the fecal position mug.Where the female partner sits cross-legged with her legs crossed behind the male. Creates a tighter penetration and allows for eye contact during orgasm.
Jenny got home after 11 that night. Work had run late, so she missed the movie she and Kyle had planned to see. Opening the door, she saw a dim pink light from the other room. She knew exactly what was in store for her that night. Dropping her bags, she slowly walked towards the bedroom, swinging her hips. Jenny saw her favorite set up- the room clear of everything except for the bed and a table with wine in two glasses. And her favorite part- Kyle, in his tight workout tee and flannel pants. "Hey, beautiful", he purred. Jenny already felt the heat in her pussy as she stalked towards him and knelt on the bed. "Hey, handsome" she smiled. Climbing on top of him, she began to lap dance and rub him. Kyle felt his bulge hardening. He whipped her around and lowered his head. Excited, Jenny was ready for his inviting tongue to eat her out right then, but instead, he too the bottom of her silk blouse in his teeth and tore it off her. Jenny knew what to do. She grabbed his throbbing bulge while taking off his tee. Growling, he stroked her wet pussy as he worked her pants down with his other hand. Delighted, Jenny used her hands to rip off his flannel pants while she pleasured him with her mouth through his boxers. Kyle laughed and pulled her in.
Jenny got home after 11 that night. Work had run late, so she missed the movie she and Kyle had planned to see. Opening the door, she saw a dim pink light from the other room. She knew exactly what was in store for her that night. Dropping her bags, she slowly walked towards the bedroom, swinging her hips. Jenny saw her favorite set up- the room clear of everything except for the bed and a table with wine in two glasses. And her favorite part- Kyle, in his tight workout tee and flannel pants. "Hey, beautiful", he purred. Jenny already felt the heat in her pussy as she stalked towards him and knelt on the bed. "Hey, handsome" she smiled. Climbing on top of him, she began to lap dance and rub him. Kyle felt his bulge hardening. He whipped her around and lowered his head. Excited, Jenny was ready for his inviting tongue to eat her out right then, but instead, he too the bottom of her silk blouse in his teeth and tore it off her. Jenny knew what to do. She grabbed his throbbing bulge while taking off his tee. Growling, he stroked her wet pussy as he worked her pants down with his other hand. Delighted, Jenny used her hands to rip off his flannel pants while she pleasured him with her mouth through his boxers. Kyle laughed and pulled her in.
But before he could get too into it, Jenny stopped. Kyle looked up questioningly. "You know, it's been a really long day. I think I just need to sit down." Jenny murmured. Kyle wasn't happy but he understood. As he turned away, Jenny grabbed the elastic of his boxers. "It's been such a day that I need help getting undressed" Jenny said seductively. The words dawned on Kyle as he reached around her to unhook her bra. Jenny laughed. Ripping it off, Kyle took off her black lace underwear just as quickly. "And, you know, I could use some wine," Jenny smiled. Kyle poured her a glass of Merlot and handed it to her. But she had something else in mind. Working off his boxers, Jenny tipped the glass over his 9" erection, spilling the wine. "Oops." Jenny began to straddle him. She crossed her legs behind him. That was her favorite way to do it, indian position."Maybe I really do need to sit-" He thrusted his heaving cock into her wide open pussy. "-down." Kyle finished. Thrusting her hips all around, Jenny began to climax. The sheer lust in her eyes was enough to get Kyle going harder. "Deeper, deeper daddy!" Jenny moaned. Kyle thrusted his rock-hard shaft into her. The sweet smell of the wine-lube was turning him on. "OHHH YEAHH DADDY! GIVE IT TO ME HARDER!" Jenny screamed, climaxing. Kyle exploded inside her and they both fell back with a sigh. After that, they proceeded to do it every night. Indian style.
by IAmNotThrowingAwayMyShit June 30, 2017
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