Cunt Bagel

When you take two halves of a bagel, put one side over a girls asshole and the other over her vagina, then proceed to eat through the bagel and eat her out. Optionally, you could eat her out through the hole of the bagel if you don't want to eat the bagel half.

Bruh I tried to make a cunt bagel out of Becky but she didn't want anything but a dick near her cunt.

by DefectiveFish May 21, 2017

crispy bagel

The supreme type of bread; a plain, room temp bagel with cream cheese that was toasted until brown. Eating this will announce to the world: "Sup fuckers, I'm insert name here and I have a large dick"

Damn, that chad is eating a crispy bagel, must have a large dick.

by SStec November 18, 2019

Bagel Run

When your mind wanders during conversation, as if it's going off to get bagels for a second.

"Sorry, could you repeat that? I was on a bagel run just now."

by TwoBrassBrads June 17, 2012

Bagel Head

A person who is rather plain, typical, or boring. A person who doesn't exactly have any special qualities to them. For Example: a barely to non-existing personality.

"You're always the same mate; dark clothes, always acting tough, you're just a plain Bagel Head man."

by Goat_011 July 31, 2020

bagel throat

The feeling of a phlegm-like, sticky substance in the throat, perhaps after eating a bagel.

*clears throat* "just bagel throat guys"

by therealharrypotter November 24, 2013

Bagel Jizz

when the cream cheese from the bagel you are eating gets in the corners of your mouth

co-worker: "You got some bagel jizz on your face"

by kopask January 18, 2015

Spatch-bagel

A person who is weird or creepy. This kind of person is usually avoided by the general public.

Girl 1:"Hey why don't you dance with matt?"
Girl 2: "Psh hellna he's such a spatch-bagel. He comments all my pictures on myspace and i barely know him!"

The Spatch-bagel sat at home and played pokemon by himself...all day

by Drippy MC August 25, 2008