Milking a turtle 

Doing a lot of work for a reward that isn't really there.

guy 1: Hey man, I've been saving up money to buy my ex-girlfriend this engagement ring to show her i love her after i cheated on her.

guy 2: You're milking a turtle, bro, she isn't going to take you back.

Milking a turtle by doremiabc November 20, 2010

Turtle 

A person who has retreated into a metaphorical shell in order to block out all life-related shit and responsibilities.

Joe: I'm going full turtle.

Amy: You can't! You have two essays to write tonight!
Joe: I don't care. I'm a turtle!

Turtle by Therealturtle December 3, 2013

turtle 

a flying meatball

aidan:is that a bird
Henry:no its a turtle

turtle by ou4w May 17, 2019

Turtleist 

Turtleists are followers of the Turtleism religion. Turtleists do not believe in any religion besides Turtleism. They worship all turtles and believe that they are holy.

Man: Hey, do you know what religion Guy is?
Lady: Yeah, he's a Turtleist.

Turtleist by Turtles Are Holy August 20, 2011

Turtle Tug 

A handjob received whilst on Adderall

Jacob popped an addy and decided a turtle tug was more important than his studies

Turtle Tug by Milli Milli McMoney March 14, 2014

Turtle titties 

Boobs with nipples that cave in like pot holes.

"Dude. That girl has turtle titties!"

Turtle titties by ImperialNarwahl May 11, 2014

Decapitated Turtle

When you have a turtle head pertruding out of your anus and you clench the anus hole and the turtle head falls off. Commonly known as the decapitated turtle.

Holy SHIT, my turtle head fell off in my pants and has left thick skids oh damn. Stupid decapitated turtle, shouldnt clench my anus when so excited.

Decapitated Turtle by Lee puff and dust August 28, 2009