Performative Bible

criminal-mafia republicans tweeting pious garbage to distract from being terrible
Suzie was perusing Twitter and came across Kelly Loeffler's tweet from book of Matthew. "Wait isn't she the insider-trading gal?" she thought to herself. "My god these depraved republicans always do Performative Bible like we don't know they broke the law"
by Uncle Joosie December 28, 2020
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the holy bible

something you might need after looking at porn
Person1: I just looked at unholyness, and I need the holy bible.
Person2: Hol up.
by table fan February 20, 2021
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Bible Thumper

Person who uses the Bible to attack other via Facebook, Twitter and other social media outlets.

Typically, this person has no life of their own and they try to live out their lives by perceiving their god-given right to tell everyone else how they can improve their lives, while completely ignoring or being ignorant of their own place in their own self-created universe (typically of self-isolation and lack of committment). This person is notoriously unreliable and ready to attack anyone that does not agree with them on level (not just via the bible thump).
The bible thumper bigot used their Bible verse of the book of Morons 3: 1-167, 172, 178 to explain that they are never wrong.
by FacebookBibleThumpingHater January 28, 2014
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Dislexic Bible

A Bible written by dislexics, for dislexics.
DISLEXIC BIBLE:

OBJ 31:1,
I made an convent with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a daim?
by Gene Sins January 13, 2007
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Dislexic Bible

A Bible written by dislexics, for dislexics.
DISLEXIC BIBLE:

Exitdust 20:8,
Remember, thesa bbath a day, to keep pits holy.
by Gene Sins January 13, 2007
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reading the bible

When people only read one part of a larger text, and completely miss the point. This happens a lot in many contexts. Some people even use parts of bible passages to do things that aren't actually good if they were to read the complete passage.
You've completely misunderstood my letter because you didn't read the whole thing through! You're reading the bible!
by Grau April 23, 2007
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Bible

A book that offends snowflakes and gay people, showing them they will rot in hell
The Bible is the only way to salvation and eternal life
by bgross152 December 26, 2020
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