jack wipe

the cross between a jackass, and an asswipe, hince the name, jack wipe.

you jack wipe, leave me alone!

by j varone December 12, 2004

comfort wipe

a phrase for which someone has reached the lowest level of intelligence, reserved for true retards who probably don't know how to wipe their own asses.

1."Jesus Marco, why did you crack my pencil in half? Youre SUCH a comfort wipe"
2."Comfort wipe, my ASS!"
3."Jesus Christ Susanna why'd you key your own car?" "I thought someone stole my parking space!" " Susanna your such a fucking comfort wipe. "

by KaiLilly September 2, 2009

courtesy wipe

one who needs to go the restroom and re-wipe their ass, because they did not get it all the first time around.

Greg is walking with his friends and spots a public washroom. He says to them wait here, I need to go for a courtesy wipe.

by king tim January 3, 2007

Conqueror's Wipe

When you have to really put some effort into passing a massive shit, and put one foot up on the bath to wipe your arse, having totally dominated the toilet.

After eating a 40oz steak the night before, it took GP half an hour to pass the results, but the Conqueror's Wipe afterwards was totally, totally justified

by Gronksucker March 27, 2019

Hate Wipe

When you wipe after pooping, and your finger breaks through the toilet paper into your butthole.

Yesterday I accidentally hate wiped myself at my parents house.

by Snipedog22 January 3, 2017

Wayward Wipe

The accidental spreading of poop on your butt when wiping and not getting it fully removed.

Husband: I pooped but I think I had a wayward wipe because it still smells back there.
Wife: What is wrong with you?!?!

by Urban humor July 30, 2017

wipe of faith

Not wiping ur ass after knowing you had a clean pinch. Trusting that your ass will not itch 20mins later from shit sticking to your butthole

I just took a huge duke on break. I took the wipe of faith and Im regretting it

by LimpPimp November 17, 2015