Johned

To mess up frequently in cases particularity to spelling, grammar, and attracting females.

Guy #1: Look at that guy, he just got denied by that girl.
Guy #2: Ya, he totally johned up.

by Monica Marcone April 6, 2017

Johned

To be completely and utterly obliterated, typically by way of an incredibly forceful skull fucking.

Holy shit man, Eric just got fucking Johned into pink mist!

Person #1: Did you see that Johnning last night?
Person #2: Yeah dude, I haven't seen somebody get Johned like that since Brad got his eyeball ripped out and the empty socket fucked with a 12-incher.

by SleepySap May 8, 2017

Johnathan

Very unsatisfactory when it comes to well satisfaction! Disappointing in most cases but can be a good friend in other cases but a lot of people could call him a piece of sh*t behind his back

Steve: have you seen johnathan?
Dennis: yea still as much of a bi*tch he was last week

by Albert Einsteinium July 14, 2017

johnston sesh

Masturbating 2 1/2 times in 7 minutes

I'm gonna go have a johnston sesh

by Blem97 October 15, 2017

Johnstoned

When something is burnt. Originating from when employees at restaurants burn their food.

Wow that food looks Johnstoned.
Is Ryan working tonight because that’s Johnstoned.

by TomPake November 5, 2017

johnathon rodney

Name used to describe a joint/jrod there for meaning Johnathon Rodney

Smoke a Johnathon Rodney

by Mastersnoop November 6, 2017

johnathan conroy

A fucking retard who looks like a toenail and calls people shmeet thinking hes something he's not

"Yo look at that retarted kid going around calling people a shmeet "
"he must be a johnathan conroy

by guy 7 787878w April 20, 2018