Majestic beard

Beard growth showing impressive beauty and impressing all the people around it.
It's so impressive you just want to touch it and yes it will bring you luck.

Hey dude, can I touch your majestic beard I need the luck??

by Braam October 9, 2014

beard of allah

A big black hairy snatch

Similar in appearance at least perceptually to the infamous black beard of Muslim deity , Allah .

The muff on her was big black and bushy .
A proper beard of Allah

by Napoleon BonerPart February 17, 2023

santa beards

The act of two males masturbating feverishly and ejaculating all over each others ball sacks. The resulting cream covered hairy sacks is known as "santa beards".

guy 1 "Oh man I was so drunk last night what happened?"
guy 2 "I think we gave each other santa beards."
guy 1 "That's why my underwears all stuck together."

by Mikhailo Meersmachov December 26, 2010

half beard

n. facial hair that is about half the length required to be a full beard.

LG: You aren't looking so professional in your polo today.
DK: That's quite a professional half beard you're sporting.
LG: Really? I was just being lazy.

by dkizzle September 15, 2007

Schrodinger’s beard

When someone has a sizable amount of facial hair, but it still cannot be considered a beard. Usually common in high school boys and reddit moderators.

Person 1: I cant tell if that guy has a beard or not
Person 2: Yeah. He’s got a Schrodinger’s beard

by TotallyDinosaur October 3, 2023

zombie-beard

A combination of zombie apocalypse and neck beard. It it well known that neckbeards are obsessed with the collapse of society, so they fantasize about some kind of apocalypse. The thing is that most neck beards are either extremely over or underweight there for extremely unathlectic, so in the extremely unlikely events of an apocalypse they will most likely be the ones to die first for obvious reason. I’ll give them credit that they usually know a lot about survival, but that’s about it. There are three main reasons why they have this mindset.
1) They don’t have the social skills to fit into normal society

2) There are no marriage laws so they can force a fair maiden to court them and be some kind of white knight
3) They think their gonna be Rick Grimes from the Walking Dead or maybe even a Daryl, but in reality they’re most likely a Eugene

4) They think they will somehow out live all the athletes and chads
In the end why the hell would anyone want anything a horrible as some kind of apocalypse to happen. I mean seeing all your loved ones get eaten and die that’s just plain awful.

Yes people like this actually exist
Zombie-beard: I’m so ready for the apocalypse I have all my katanas and machine guns!
“Chad”: How will you outrun them? You’re 300lbs?
Zombie-beard: I won’t run like a coward I’ll kill them all! You ignorant simpleton!
“Chad”: Whatever man.
*zombie outbreak*
“Chad”: Oh shit! Run!
Zombie-beard: *gets eaten* AHHHHH! NO! THIS IS NOT HOW IT TURNS OUT IN MY THE WALKING DEAD FAN-FICTIONS MAGGIE WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE GLENN FOR A REAL GENTLEMAN LIKE MEEE!!1!
Maggie: Who is that guy?
Glenn: No idea

by Thequeenofbasicbitchery October 28, 2017

cooter beard

A cooter beard is a mustache/goatee combo that connects and resembles a 1970s vagina, crudely referred to as a cooter.

In an disturbing grooming trend, more and more men are sporting the cooter beard.

by Navinger March 6, 2020