turtle test

A turtle test is when you're not sure if you need to fart or shit, so you relax your butthole and push a little, and if a turtle's head peeks out, you clench your ass so you don't shit yourself. That is a "positive" turtle test. A "negative" is when a fart comes out.

Dude, pull over, I've gotta take a shit.

No way Bro, can't you just fart or something?

I just did a turtle test Dude, and it was positive. Pull over before I shit in your car.

by Otto Parts December 12, 2012

happy turtle

NOUN: a sexually satisfied uncircumsized man.
Turtle references the appearance of an uncut penis.

Girl One: You hooked up with Ricardo?
Girl Two: We had sex all night long.
Girl One: Ah---that was one happy turtle.
Girl Two: Of course.

by rpm+me=ht September 19, 2008

save the turtles

A phrase mostly used by VSCO girls but they dont actually mean it. they only think that banning straws will help turtles but actually there are so many different things that harm not only turtles but every sea animal
SHAME TO THE VSCO'S

OMG save the turtles SSKKSKSKSKKSKSKKS

by uraseed September 17, 2019

turtle necking

When you are nowhere near a toilet and that turd stuck in your hole is peeking in and out. You gotta have control so it doesn't slip out.

Dude, I have to go so bad I'm turtle necking.

by Mr Poop April 10, 2005

Turtle shell

The really annoying things in mario kart that fuck you up really bad. They come in three different types:green, red(or brown), or blue. The green ones aren't so bad they just fling around stupidly. The brown ones, you should watch out for.
They seek the person in front of you and fuck them up. The blue ones automattically go to the player in 1st place.

"I was in first place, then fuckin yoshi threw a red turtle shell at me and I got fourth."

by thecrazyone1104 June 12, 2008

Tonka Turtle

A large feminine physique, with a round tummy, ugly face, likes there food and a hump in the back. Usually a stage 5 clinger. Also usually pleased with a purchase of french fries.

Wowww there are tonka turtles everywhere! Look at them eating their frenchhh fries

by schifo December 27, 2010

Nuclear Turtle

A nuclear turtle refers to a nuclear turd that won't quite launch. The missile is armed, the silo doors are open, but instead of launching, the head of the nuclear turd peeks out, much like a turtle in its shell. At this point, the nuclear turd has morphed into a nuclear turtle.

The silo doors are open, but my nuclear turd won't launch, looks like I've got a nuclear turtle.

I've been waiting on this nuclear turd for half an hour, I guess its now officially a nuclear turtle.

by Dr. Strangedump October 20, 2010