Someone who simply steals your poop. You could be taking a nice dump, not knowing what’s hiding in your shower, or under your sink… as soon as you stand up from the toilet and turn away for a second… your turd will be gone because the turd burglar took it. You will not catch them… nor see them.. unless they’re over 34 years of age. They are either assigned to a person at the age of 6, or placed into a house when built, and will steal everyone’s turds that ever lives there.
Frank - “Yo… I just took a shit, and when I turned around to flush… it wasn’t there”
Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar
Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar
by Stinkletoot May 26, 2024
Get the turd burglarmug. A “Turd Burglar” is When Courtney R is being a crazy radioactive bad ass bitch w seven flavors of that bootylicious bubble gum.
by Anner Bananaer March 8, 2025
Get the Turd burglarmug. Clam Burglar:
(Cl-am Berg-ger-lar)
1. Noun: An aggressive lesbian
2. Verb: To grab a lady by the pussy
3. Noun: A thief who steals exclusively clams from a seafood market or Red Lobster
(Cl-am Berg-ger-lar)
1. Noun: An aggressive lesbian
2. Verb: To grab a lady by the pussy
3. Noun: A thief who steals exclusively clams from a seafood market or Red Lobster
John Doe: “Hey. That’s definitely a Clam Burglar over there in the Peanutbutter Hair Cut and hairy armpits.
Jim Doe: “Nah homes…. That’s Crystal…She just likes to weed eight times a day….”
Jim Doe: “Nah homes…. That’s Crystal…She just likes to weed eight times a day….”
by C.S.H. March 13, 2022
Get the Clam Burglarmug. A person who buys, or tries to steal, something that is in a bad state of repair and thinks they will be able to sell it after a minor amount of shoddy work for much more money.
Man I can't tell you how many turd burglars from craiglist are blowing up my phone asking me if they think the car I am selling for parts can be rebuilt and made road worthy.
by K2xW July 17, 2021
Get the Turd Burglarmug. 
Someone who realizes the public knows they turd the bed and wants to deny and cover it up… with both sheets and lawyers hired from wish.
She showed just how poorly her acting was and even looked like she was straining on the stand after all the world discovered she is a Heard Burglar.
by LightFoe May 24, 2022
Get the Heard Burglarmug. A Turd burglar is a mythical being that takes your turds (aka poop) from your toilet at night when everyone is asleep, similar to the tooth fairy legend.
Little boy: Mommy when will the turd burglar come?
Mother: oh honey the turd burglar only comes at night when your asleep.
Mother: oh honey the turd burglar only comes at night when your asleep.
by BeeftGunkle June 20, 2023
Get the Turd burglarmug.