Tracket

A Tracket is a piece of attire favoured in the Northeast of England, which is crafted from the finest grade tracksuit cotton and fashioned into an evening jacket, forming the iconic: Tracket. It is perfect combination of relaxed style and street cred needed when purchasing vodka for the local high school kids (of course at a premium; a Tracket collection does not pay for itself!) or when needing to convince a bouncer that you are worthy of entering the local discotheque, despite it being the stage of the night when you don't even know your own name. With Tracket on, it’s Bruce Wayne, player!

Functionality is also paramount in the Tracket’s appeal in that the expense and time wasted lining up for North East England’s only dry cleaner at which Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne’s caravan of England 1990 World Cup shirts are perpetually being cleaned, is not lost as it is washing machine (delicate-cycle) friendly. This puts you: Tracketer - owner of the tracket - in control and right where you wants to be; on the tiles and throwing the kind of shapes that only 12 pints of Stella on a Tuesday night and the flexibility of jacket fashioned out tracksuit material can let you perform!

“No ladies, my mum did not sew this for me... a mother of 12 in China did for Topshop. Oppression for £100 fits like a glove on an iron fist!”

Dave: The police locked me up last night...
Jim: Was is it because you were drunk on the street, cursed relentlessly at that group of boy scouts, before kicking a guide dog and telling its owner to watch where they were going?
Dave: No, it’s because I was wearing a Tracket.
Jim: Snap, lucky you didn’t have double denim on also, or that would be a 10 year stretch!

by Shmick0 July 25, 2011

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trickanosis

n. pronounced:\'trik-a- nō-səs\ A disease caused by having a trick(s) on the penis.

Sign and Symptoms:

Tricks may be hard to cure because they keep resurfacing on the penis.

You may not notice the tricks at first, symptoms could take days to manifest.

Clouded judgement.

Empty Wallet.

Cures:

Gradual but steady avoidance of sexual activity with women of the trick / hood booger variety.

Cold turkey abstinence (With this method may come other trickanosis consequences, such as stalking, car keying, false police reports, fake pregnancies etc.)

Visiting or talking with level headed friends and family can help ease the clouded judgement symptom.

Loss of job or income could help alleviate the empty wallet symptom.

His boy informed him that his love of trick booty resulted in a severe case of trickanosis.

by voeuetoile November 25, 2011

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