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certified idiot

a person who is knowledgeable in things which do not help them in any situation for example algebra. This person does not understand any basic things about the world or has any common sense. they are sometimes fun to be around but make you loose brain cells. they lack basic qualities such as driving, responding, playing spike ball and many more.
I hungout with ellyn last night and she is a certified idiot. She even thought texas was her own country!!
by hahahahahahahhahahahaa June 29, 2020
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Certified Frieza Moment

A certified Frieza moment is when, you conquer a group of people, a nation, a world, or a universe. Its a example of taking the W
“Yo, I heard you conquered the southern galaxy, thats a Certified Frieza moment”
by Friezasagamerngl June 20, 2022
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Playboi Carti

Gay vampire who lies to his fans.
Playboi Carti: narcissist 9/13/21
9/13/21: comes and passes
Carti fans: where the album at?
Carti:
by Nimnex March 6, 2022
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Cortina

A range of four and six cylinder sedans created by ford, running from the late 60's through to the mid 80's. Offered as only a 4 cylinder in the european market, Ford Australia imported numerous Cortina's and fitted them with a six cylinder engine from the local family sized car of the time the Falcon, whilst this endowed the cortina with prodigious straight line speed, the heavier six cylinder tended to make the car understeer. The increase in power and despite a heavier engine in the front, does make the six cylinder cortina an excellent car for burnouts. The easiset way to tell the difference between a 4 and 6 cylinder Cortina is the presence of a "bulge" on the bonnet in six cylinder equipped cars.
Wow, that guy in that cortina just went past us like we were standing still.

Person 1: wow that guy with his car firmly implanted into that wall must have forgot there was a corner there.
Person 2: no thats a six-cylinder cortina they tend to do that.

The hoon proceeded to do many burnouts in his pristine stock Cortina.
by Gavyn_01 May 30, 2008
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Certified Financial Planner

Somebody with no money, who never learned how to mass or build money, and somehow thought it'd be a wise career decision to tell others what to do with their money.

since this joker never had money, he always talked about his life and what he would do if he had the riches. so instead of earning it himself, he throws on a cheap suit and a smile and sells financial advice to complete retards.

NOT to be confused with CPA or any other real professional.
"what happened to that guy who got fired 3 months ago?"
"he told me he's tending bar but i went there and he's just a bus boy, moved in with his girlfriend, she sold him her car so he could get around, he's supposed to be starting a job as a Certified Financial Planner at New York Life:
by speculatorninja February 9, 2010
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Penis Certification

1.Certification of authenticity of a penis.
2.Certification of the health of a penis.
1.I hate those lying gossip magazines, I've got penis certification, dammit!
2.Check my penis certifications out, Lourdes, I'm all safe!
by A$$LickaLowd October 1, 2008
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Joe Certified

A term describing a particular type of woman. A "Joe Certified" woman must be over 5'10", under 110lbs, with "C" cups or larger. Hair color is not required to be blonde, but blondes do get extra points, as does that slightly slutty look.
Check out that bitch, she's 100% "Joe Certified"
by Midnightjoe July 8, 2011
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