morning press

the act of pressing one's erect penis firmly against a mattress or other sleeping surface upon waking in order to gain small amounts of physical pleasure similar to that of grinding

The young man did an extended morning press the first day of high school.

by Terry Sachs December 25, 2011

Morning Timber

Masturbating immediately after waking up, with morning wood.

"Hey John, what'd you do this morning"
"Ah, I just Morning Timbered."
"... What?"

by Colver August 11, 2014

morningy

the state of feeling comfy and like you're in the early morning.

"i am feeling quite morningy today "

by carl jonsie July 21, 2017

morning forest

when multiple men wake up and get morning woods together

i woke up and could tell all my friends had boners, it's a morning forest around here.

by big.cock September 16, 2017

Morning Strainer

One tough shit in the morning. Usually a result of dehydration from drinking the night before. Requires monumental force to release.

Frank is going to be a while. He’s got a Morning strainer.

by Eaton Holgoode December 10, 2017

Morning former glory

When you wake up the next day after butt fucking some Ho the night before whilst wearing beer goggles. You fancy seconds, but then discover she is an absolute munter. Your previously rock hard shaft is reduced to a limp mess

"Hey bitch, fancy another anal probe? Oh shit, what a horror, my cock's gone down worse than the titanic, what a waste of my morning former glory"

by BaldyMcSlaphead October 9, 2018

Morning Shitdown

When you wake up first thing in the morning and sit on the toilet to let out a couple of shits, but mainly to wind down and do time wasting activities such as using your smartphone.

Person 1: “What’s taking you so long in there??”
Person 2: “I’m enjoying my Morning shitdown go away”

by See not us November 17, 2018