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Jesus Fist-Fucking Christ

What comes out of your mouth after viewing an act so unbelievable that only one phrase of awe will do.
Sarah: Hey look! It's a tranny felching a midget!
Michael: Jesus Fist-Fucking Christ!
by thinknic November 1, 2008
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Jesus Eyes

1) Eyes that are slightly glazed over and wide.
-Enlarged pupils but not red
-Could be mistaken as being on drugs.
-Usually associated with a blinding white smile.

2) Judgmental tolerance; superficial
-Tend to be flight attendants, members of choir groups and owner's of craft-stores.
-Support Prop 8, wear pearls and look like Stepford Wives.
Is she stoned or is she so fake that she has Jesus Eyes ?
by Al Harwin March 31, 2009
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Supply-Side Jesus

The economic face of Jesus as imagined by (some) Republicans. Usually used as a sarcastic retort when economic interests seem to be placed ahead of social justice.
"Corporate taxes raised to fund child health care."

Supply-side Jesus would be sad.
by Markus5 October 7, 2009
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Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick

Exclamation of surprise or shock as a result of nothign short of a miracle.
Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick! How did you get pregnant without having sex?!
by scalz July 10, 2006
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Reverse Jesus

Reverse Jesus was born on Good Friday and died on Christmas day, when he was hunted down by three wise men for outstanding debts of frankincense and myrrh. Reverse Jesus turns wine into water, and kills YOU for his sins.
Reverse Jesus makes you forget how to fish entirely.
by -________________- April 4, 2008
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long haired Jesus

simply, a man with long hair, usually down to the shoulders. Jesus has long hair.
Yesterday a man with a crewcut called me a long haired Jesus.
by I Saw U2 Live Twice November 9, 2008
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Jesus Fucking Christ on the Cross

Perhaps the most offensive, non-racial phrase. It can be used as an exclamation when one is under stress. The phrase is synonymous with "Jesus Christ."
by lemonlime69 November 6, 2014
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