Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions

The probability of a finance manager forgetting to collect the down payment that is directly proportional to the size of the down payment and inversely proportional to the memory capacity of the involved manager.

I saw the finance manager running after a customer realizing that Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions had taken place.

by K9 _Cop May 22, 2024

first-cousin-twice-removed-in-law

1- First-cousin-twice-removed's spouse.
2- Spouse's first-cousin-twice-removed.
3- 1C2R-in-law.

My first-cousin-twice-removed-in-law is a good person.

by User655 July 25, 2021

step-co-sister-in-law

Spouse's stepsibling's wife.

My step-co-sister-in-law is a good person.

by Wonbig October 13, 2021

Dang’s Law

As long as your girlfriend is the last person you’ve slept with you haven’t cheated.

Person 1: Mate didn’t you sleep with Sarah?

Person 2: Yeah but I slept with my girlfriend today so according to Dang’s law I haven’t cheated.

by Name Guru January 15, 2022

Basil’s Law

All bourgeois political kayfabe boils down to projected raceplay fetishes

Person1: That black feminist chick from college just posted her white boyfriend on her insta

Person2: dude…. Basil’s Law!!!

by MMAFayce January 23, 2024

stepgrandchild-in-law

Stepgrandchild's spouse.

My stepgrandchild-in-law is a good person.

by Wonbig October 13, 2021

Murphy's Law of Exceptions

"You can follow an 'unpopular' method or procedure 'till da cows come home' and nothing unusual will ever happen to 'justify' or 'vindicate' your unorthodox actions (and you'll likely get continually criticized by others for your chosen behavior), but then the ONE TIME when you eventually 'cave' and actually DO happen to follow the 'standard' or 'acceptable' protocol, THAT'S the solitary 'rogue occasion' when disaster will happen to strike --- something really bad will happen that would not have occurred if you had simply continued to follow your own 'pet' procedure that had seemed better/safer to begin with!"

My "super-long-term-driving-experienced" aunt had gotten fed up with my "back-seat driver" attempts to be helpful by telling her about vehicles that I'd see moving around fairly near our position when we'd be travelling someplace in her car, and so she had eventually asked me to just keep quiet and let here handle the driving herself. Well, of course, within a day or two, Murphy's Law of Exceptions decided to turn and bite me in da butt --- due to a view-obstructing sidewalk-mounted ad-sign, my aunt didn't notice an approaching car, but I did... naturally, that was the ONE TIME that I **didn't** tell her about it because she'd specifically asked me to keep my trap shut on instances like that, and so I'd ASSUMED (there's that word again!) that she'd observed the vehicle bearing down on the intersection. Well, as you might expect, we crashed, and there were multiple injuries in the other car! Can't win...!

by QuacksO March 9, 2019