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pay the waitress

A euphemism meaning sexual intercourse. Giving her the tip.
Doug: Hey dude, wanna hang?
Rob: I'm with the girlfriend about to pay the waitress. Gimme thirty minutes.
by wr36 February 6, 2014
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witless bitch

One who finds themself very funny, though no else around them does.
Gina is a witless bitch; she's the only one that laughs at her "jokes".
by Jacques December 23, 2004
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cocktail waitress

a woman that works HARD for her money, dealing with drunk horny men.
"There once was a tale of a cocktail waitress... who loves cock in her tail and she won't debate this"
by sheeneez August 16, 2008
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Jehovah's Witless

A derogatory nickname for a Jehovah's Witness, refering to the apparent witless, clueless and lamebrain beliefs (as percieved by normal persons) of the church dogma and its members.
Do you Jehovah's Witlesses always dress like dorks or are these just your Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes?
by GBofWI March 18, 2007
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witlessism

witlessism (wit less iz em) NOUN. A failed attempt to sound wise or clever.
"I'm telling you there's an enemy that would like to attack America, Americans, again. There just is. That's the reality of the world. And I wish him all the very best." -George W. Bush, Jan. 12, 2009

"I've been in the Bible every day since I've been the president." -George W. Bush, Nov. 12, 2008

"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way." -George W. Bush, April 28, 2005

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." -George W. Bush, Aug. 5, 2004

Are good examples of witlessisms.
by Maxhole June 25, 2009
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I'm Not Really A Waitress

The specific color of red nail polish that is used in countless old movies and commercials for it's sheer mass appeal. Women then go out and try to imitate the looks and mannerisms of these silver screen stars, right down to their flawless red polish. It is now for sale by the company OPI in their spring collection.
Woman 1 - "That (I'm Not Really A Waitress) nail polish is soooooo gorgeous, i like have to get some so i can look just like Raquel Welch!"

Woman 2 - "You couldn't look like Raquel Welch even if you got liposuction and 100 facelifts."
by winona September 6, 2005
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Witless Protection Program

Witless Protection Program (wit less pro tek shun pro gram) NOUN. An organization devoted to saving clueless people from the consequences of their stupidity.
Molly- Did you just threaten to kill the president?

Conrad- No, I said he's going to get shot.

Molly- How would you know?

Conrad- He's GOT to, nobody's going to stand for Obama giving a million dollars to every black person in the country!

Molly- What makes you think he's going to do that?

Conrad- Oh it's obvious. You know the way all those blacks work together.

(she scribbles something on a scrap of paper).

Molly- You are going to need this number.

Conrad- Who's this?

Molly- That's the number for the Witless Protection Program.
by Maxhole June 25, 2009
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