flatubate

The art of masturbating while enveloped in a self inflicted Dutch Oven. Often done on cold, lonely nights when you couldn't even score with the leftover fatties at the pub. After twelve pints of Guinness and 2am Taco Bell, flatubating is an obvious way to regain some dignity after failing to score. The added benefit is that it's cheaper than buying condoms or cologne. You're having sex with someone you already know. And who doesn't enjoy the smell of their own farts?

"Dude, even that fat ugly chick turned me down. I'm gonna load up on Pintos and Cheese, go home and flatubate in my own king size bed."

by Bugsy McDingle January 11, 2012

double feature

The act of seeing two movies for the price of one at a public movie theater. You watch the first movie, take special notice of when the next movie will start, hang out in the restroom until the appropriate start time, and then mosey on over to the correct theater. It causes undue stress for only saving 10 bucks, but it can make an afternoon fly by.

So I was checking out a double feature the other day, but I was so nervous I hid out in the women's restroom! So much for not calling attention to myself

by Youthful Wisdom February 22, 2007

phantom flatulence

Farts with questionable origin or cause. Not to be confused with the source of the gas (i.e. your butt, your friend's butt).

Damn! Where's all this phantom flatulence coming from?? I already went to the bathroom today!

by jWizzle & jShizzle October 23, 2005

haiku flatulence

Farts artfully expressed in a strict 5-7-5 haiku formation.

He got up onstage, passing unparalleled and beautiful haiku flatulence, quickly bringing his audience to tears.

by Dr Bunnygirl May 29, 2019

death flatulence

That final fart that sometimes escapes from a dead body in the process of moving it.

As they rolled him onto the cart, my father emitted some truly horrific death flatulence; it struck me then how this may have been his final comment.

by Dr Bunnygirl August 24, 2019

sartorial flatulence

Farting while dressed to the nines.

To watch her move down the catwalk in that most glorious manner somehow makes her loud but sartorial flatulence entirely benign.

by Dr Bunnygirl May 31, 2020

Fartnando Flatulencio

Fartnando Flatulencio is a fictional character created by my El_Moco's cousin Aarón Amilián.

Fartnando Flatulencio is a fictional character created by El Moco's cousin, actor Aarón Amilián.

by El_Moco February 12, 2021