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chainsaw consultant

Independent contractors brought in by upper management under the auspices of "streamlining work flow", but in actuality to suggest what positions can be eliminated thus reducing headcount and overhead for purposes of downsizing.
In the movie "Office Space" the characters referred to as "The Bobs" are classic examples of chainsaw consultants. The main character avoids being fired through a combination of unexpected brutal honesty about his lack of passion for his position, and also engendering camaraderie with those sent to determine if his
job is really necessary.
by Cale Dempster December 18, 2008
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Chainsaw Cannon

An absolutely devastating weapon created by a genius determined to exterminate a being that wishes to end all reality. If you ever obtain a Chainsaw Cannon, caution is advised as people will try to steal your ultimate weapon from you, so your only option is to chainsaw cannon them! Then you may rule over your new domain as a chainsaw cannon monarch.
"Hey, i got myself a chainsaw cannon"
"No way!"
"Yeah, and it's aimed at the United States Military!"
by Octagonal Revolver October 6, 2020
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rusty chainsaw

Similar to the Vulcan, and the shocker. The rusty chainsaw is the act of penetrating a womans' anus with the entire hand very rapidly. The remnants left on your hand after the act give the "rusty" appearance.
My wife pissed me off the other day so, as revenge when we were going at it doggystyle I gave that bitch the ol' rusty chainsaw. That's why I'm staying in the hotel tonight.
by Smittay September 26, 2007
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chainis

Among the most versatile words in the history of all languages, the word 'chainis', as some like to enunciate it, is a word applicable in all contexts and situations, taking on a plethora of meanings from the soft grace of a rose petal as it gently lays to rest in a calm, summer pond to being a complete dumbass. It is often aptly altered with prefixes, post-fixes and other common grammatical constructions to suit the general mood being felt by a group of individuals. It is believed by traditionalists that embedded within every soul, is the desire to utter such glory. The fulfillment felt by one who recites it at the appropriate time is distinct and available only to those of refined taste. Contrary to popular opinion, chainis is not the equivalent to 'Chinese' (an Asian nationality and culture) and any such attempt to assert this is offensive, ignorant and met with contempt.
Friend: "Hey man, are you going to paintball this weekend?"
Gentleman: "Chainis ;)"
Friend: "...Is that a yes or a no?"

Barista: "Hello sir, would you like cream or sugar in your coffee today?"
Gentleman: "Chainis ;)"
Barista: "You again!?! Security!"

Priest: "Do you take her as your lawfully wedded wife?"
Gentleman: "Chainis"
Priest: "Wow, just wow, I'm so done with this shit."
*Flips over table holding wedding cake and leaves*
Fiancee: "You've ruined everything! I hate you!"
*Starts crying and storms off*

Man of Lesser Intellect: "Hey, you know its really immature and unbecoming of you to keep using that silly word."
Gentleman: "Shut up, you chainis."
Man of Lesser Intellect: "Getting real tired of your shit..."

Psychotherapist: "So tell me, when did you first start using this word, what was it... chainis?"
Gentleman: "Don't try that simplified chainis bullshit with me, all you'll get is a plate full of chainis with side order of chainis and also, chainis"
Psychotherapist: *writes in notepad* "Needs extensive treatment, possibly electroshock therapy with several rounds of psychoactive medication"

Priest: "Does anybody wish to say any last words before we lower his body into the ground?"
Resentful Spirit: "Yeah, why don't you go chainis yourself, you post-chainis chainiser"
Resentful Spirit 2: "Nigga, you owe me rent!"
by shaymis lue December 13, 2014
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Flabby chainsaw

Yarding anal beads out in a quick jerking motion like starting a chainsaw.
Gave her the ole' flabby chainsaw last night and she damn near cried after she reckoned
by Chainsawer August 29, 2016
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Brazillian Chainsaw

A Brazillian Chainsaw, is when you find a fat girl, take her home, put a double dildo in her for 5 days let her shit and piss in your mouth feed it to her, and then let her shit it all out.
Hey don, why the fuck are you so smelly, Oh I did a Brazillian Chainsaw with my bitch.
by Black Kid Sensation January 18, 2021
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Dirty Chainsaw

When a novice anal bead user pulls the string of beads out too quickly as if he were trying to start a chainsaw, thus causing the women to poop on his chest.
Eddie: how did your date go with Juanita?

Alex: I didn't know how to use the anal beads and I pulled a dirty chainsaw.
by Puff Jr. and Pickels October 2, 2008
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