Amazon

An online shopping service founded by Jeff Bezos, who somehow manage to damage any package that you may order.

Friend "Hey dude did you buy something off of amazon?"

Me "Yeah dude but the box disintegrated by the time it got here."

by CobraCrusher October 6, 2019

amazon rank

To remove or deny a book's ranking status on Amazon.com on the basis of 'adult content', although in reality the basis is GLBT and romance novels.

To hypocritcally refuse something on the basis of 'adult content' while allowing something with an even higher 'adult content'

Example of usage: “I tried to do a report on Lady Chatterly’s Lover for English Lit, but my teacher amazon ranked me and I got an F on grounds that it was obscene.”

Alternate usage: “My girlfriend wanted to preserve her virginity, and I was happy to respect that, then she amazon ranked and decided anal sex was okay.”

by hyuy April 12, 2009

flaming amazon

The flaming amazon is when you are giving a girl the grizzle, and right before you twurk up in her drumette of love; you whip out your zippo, set her buckwheat farm on fire, then extinguish the flames with your gorilla juice.

I gave mrs. crabbush the flaming amazon, then choked the bitch with my donkey dick.

by smackdaddy August 16, 2006

A.W.S. (Amazon Withdrawal Syndrome)

An ailment, typically suffered post-holiday, by chronic online shoppers who have become conditioned to finding packages gracing their porch upon their arrival home. The sudden down-turn in deliveries can result in negative physiological events. Symptoms can include, but are not limited to anxiety, depression, malaise, night terrors, random trembling, and/or a bout of the vapors. The condition has been known to be exacerbated by the sound of delivery vehicles and ringing doorbells.

Janet was relieved when her doctor diagnosed her as suffering from A.W.S. (Amazon Withdrawal Syndrome) and prescribed a treatment regimen, but understood she knew she would always be known as a "parcel junkie".

by Angry Wound December 2, 2019

psychotic amazon

an oversized female, fat boned by nature and won't be able to lose weight even with updated medical resources; female with psychotic and suicidal tendencies because she cant handle rejection and caught up in a swindel of lies because she is a fat,unintelligent,whore,slut,bitch.

i pitty that johanna franco girl because she believes she's better than everyone, but in reality she's just a psychotic amazon and her front is just a cover up for her pathetic insecurities.

by fat feet June 27, 2008

amazon funky

beautiful, alluring, large lady with a twist

i'm feeling mixalot spunky for some amazon funky

by lexicali slim September 19, 2009

Amazon Christmas

When you come home and find you have a bunch of packages to open from your online ordering.

I think I'm going to take off next Thursday, I'm going to have myself an Amazon Christmas.

I went on a total ordering binge after I got my new camera... I think later this week I'm can expect a huge Amazon Christmas!

by TSilly September 7, 2011