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Lonely Threesome

The act of masturbating with both hands. Typically alternating between them, but many variations and techniques can be utilized depending on how slutty your hands are...

Discovered after after using the Stranger so much that it lost it's luster I wondered if my old standby would be into the idea of all of us partying together. Shockingly, they were into it!! and I realized the ultimate self satisfaction is a very low point of my life:(
Did you go out last night?

Nope, stayed home and had a "Lonely Threesome"
by Myfartssmelllikepoop February 28, 2011
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Skowhegan Threesome

A threesome involving a young male and two cats. Named for where it originated in Skowhegan Maine.
Kody may not have ever slept with a girl, but he has had a Skowhegan Threesome in the back of his Buick!
by Riley T April 7, 2021
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Devil's Threesome

A threesome including one woman and two men.
"Jane really got a good workout when Dick and Tom gave her Devil's Threesome"
by Eric, Sean, and Ben September 1, 2007
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There's Something About Mary Syndrome

1. Like the character Ben Stiller played in the movie "There's Something About Mary," the person suffering from this condition still has a strong love for a high school sweatheart, even after years of separation.
2. Like Cameron Diaz's character, this syndrome my also deal with a person stuck between two or more choices of potential partners, in which the person with said syndrome cannot choose who he/she wants.

-can be abbreviated to TSAMS
1. "Hey Brian, I saw Judy for the first time in 7 years"

"Dude, you're suffering from There's Something About Mary Syndrome."

2. "Ugh I can't choose between Brett, George, And Tom"

"Yeah TSAMS really sucks, doesn't it?"
by benny stiler September 7, 2009
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Simon Threesome

When two close males interact in a bonding experience in which they watch the same pornographic material and pleasure themselves at the same time. They do not have to be in the same room, but studies show the bond to be stronger when in the same location.
Me: "Hey buddy, do you wanna do a back-to-back Simon Threesome with me tonight?"

Griffin: "Would I ever!"

Me: "Sweet man! Don't forget a laptop, lotion, and tissues!"
by csemenmonster November 27, 2013
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National Midget Threesome Day

Couples straight and gay are encouraged to add a midget to their sexcapade . Midgets can be rented For short term events to perform various acts.. acts is a vague term .. midgets must also be fed, and treated with the utmost respect at all times. The vertically challenged adults act of 2016 stated that all vertically challenged adults be treated with respect while performing various sex acts and not spanked on their head during ejaculation ... and additionally will be payed a fair wage , as any regular vertical person would be payed ...
The National Midget Threesome Day is approaching honey , did you rent the midgets yet?
by Dr. Bob Lawbla September 26, 2018
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Threesomes

Having your cake and eating it too, then watching your cake eat another cake.
Damn, i love threesomes
by Private_Topaz August 29, 2009
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